Do you ever wonder about how big things can get? Remember when Bill Gates famously said that a computer with 640 kilobytes of memory would be all that we would ever need? He was forgetting about Microsoft's capacity for writing ballooning software and storage routines! Anyway, 1 kilobyte represents 1,024 binary digits (bits) of data and here are some monsters to think about. Bear in mind that people often write 1Kb as 1,000 bytes and to keep things simple and that's what you're about to see here Kilobyte (Kb) 1,000 bytes 2 Kilobytes: A Typewritten page Megabyte (Mb) 1,000,000 bytes 1 Megabyte: A small novel OR a 3.5 inch floppy disk Gigabyte (Gb) 1,000,000,000 bytes 1 Gigabyte: a pickup truck filled with books Terabyte (Tb) 1,000,000,000,000 bytes 1 Terabyte: 50,000 trees made into paper and printed. Petabyte (Pb)1,000,000,000,000,000 bytes 1 Petabyte: 3 years of EOS data (2001) Exabyte (Eb) 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 bytes 2 Exabytes: Total volume of information generated in 1999 See this page for the source of that fabulous information. What next? DW

I'm working myway through a Russian State Television series called The Brigade. The Brigade is a Russian Mafia programme that has the most awful English subtitles I've ever seen and whilst the storyline is not as good as it might be, here are the reasons why it's worth watching it doesn't glamourise gangsterism the life of organised crime is brutal shameless ruthless gangsters are always looking over their shoulders the families of gangsters are, whether they like it or not, part of the gang This series has acquired cult status in the Russian speaking world as far as I can tell and I know of head teachers who have had to go round every class in their school and ask "Is there is Brigade in this room?" in an attempt to quell the quasi gangsterism that early teens can dream up. Thought I'd tell you that. I don't know if it's available in the UK but I'm told that it's going down a wow in the USA. DW

What is Game Theory? That was a question that appeared on a discussion list that I subscribe to. Here is what I replied: There’s a page here that gives a decent review of game theory and it provides links to various other sites around the web. Good for you but will need editing for students. If you’re looking for examples, case studies, relating to the various aspects of Game Theory that students might enjoy, why not take a look at this page that has a series of examples taken from films and television programmes: mostly American but some British and all excellent. The language is definitely undergrad but some editing would sort it out I think. There are online tests and some film and television clips too although I haven’t looked at any of them. DW

Ever heard of the Nebra Disc? Neither had I until I watched last night's Horizon programme on the BBC. This is what it looks like this is an astronomical interpretation of it, albeit still encoded and here is the BBC's page that summarises the issue Follow the links on that BBC page and search www.google.co.uk for other references to the world's oldest known observatory record. DW

I made the weather sit up and think, then. Last night the snow came heaving down in a way not seen in these parts for a while. All you need to do is moan a bit! There was an immediate but brief thaw and then a refreeze so that made driving and walking a bit tricky! Last night Mrs W openly suggested that I should be ready to give young Master W a lift to school (10 minutes from home on the hoof!) and I suggested it wouldn't be needed. This morning guess who chanced his arm by lolling in bed until 7:50 when he needs to be up and about by 7:30? Well for me the walk would have been OK but he sauntered in to the office straight from his bed and asked for a lift I said it wasn't needed. He came back later when dressed and asked again so I referred him to his mother: she said I could take him. I harumphed a bit and then the roof fell in. Suffice it to say that no one drove anywhere and someone has taken up residence in the house in which a dog normally resides! A clue: it isn't Mrs W or Master W who is sharing the canine quadruped's humble abode. I'm off to the library now. Anyone care to join me? Such is life! I haven't exactly been flooded with offers of work from you lot so where are you? The donation begging bowl is till out, too, so get rid of your loose change by throwing it in my direction. DW

Winter's arrived in some parts of the UK. The weather men have been forecasting howling gales and lashing seas for a while. So far, I can still go outside in my flip flops and cardie! There are pictures coming down from the North showing solid white rain (that's snow!) and slithering vehicles but here in outstanding Oxfordshire we are immune. Mrs W went for a hospital appointment on Monday and you can read the update to my file that has kept a record of her saga here. Want to see my name in other peoples' lights, again? Have a look here then! DW

The UK has a streak running through it that makes me wonder how sane we are. I've mentioned Charles Ingrams before: he's the former army Major who was found guilty of attempting to defraud London Weekend Television out of £1 million by cheating on their Who wants to be a millionaire programme: GUILTY in a court of law. Ingrams was then found to have attempted to defraud an insurance company out of £30,000 I think it was. GUILTY of attempted fraud. In this week's Radio Times I see that Ingrams is being flown out to Australia to appear as a "celebrity" in the ITV programme I'm a celebrity get me out of here. I also understand he will receive £25,000 by way of a fee. Then there is the British student who told security officials at Miami Airport that she had a bomb in her back pack: she said this three times so they whisked her off to jail and kept her there until someone posted bail of £2,700 on her behalf: a businessman I think. This stupid young woman's father went on television to bleat that her treatment was unfair and an over reaction but said his daughter was an immature young girl. Once she had been released the woman herself appeared and spoke with a fake American accent! Then I heard that a British Newspaper has paid her an amount of money to cover her air fare and other expenses ... in return for exclusive story no doubt. I ask: why are these reprehensible people given such status? Ingrams is a fraud and a cheat and now we call him a celebrity. Ronnie Biggs was a thief and complicit in a murder yet people treat him as just a cheeky chappie. Jeffrey Archer was guilty of contempt of court but he is still feted as a lovable rogue. The moral of the story? Get yourself thrown in jail or try to defraud someone out of huge amount of money and you too could become a celeb. DW

I watched the Panorama progamme on Wednesday night about the Hutton enquiry and whilst I thought it wasn't a bad programme I did wonder why they had made and aired it one week prior to the publication of Huton's report. I, along with others, wrote to Panorama with my views and they published part of what I said here. Scroll down to find my incisive comments! What worries me far more than anything the programme said about anything was the aftermath: how the programme has been treated by the media. Here's an example. On this page they say His [David Kelly's] view was at odds with the claim in the government's Iraq dossier that "military planning allows for some of the WMD to be ready within 45 minutes and to support this assertion they report, later on, Describing Iraq's weapons, Dr Kelly told Panorama: "Even if they're not actually filled and deployed today, the capability exists to get them filled and deployed within a matter of days and weeks. Notice what they have missed out. Kelly started by saying that he agreed that Iraq posed an immediate threat: no doubt, no equivocation, Iraq posed an immediate threat. What journalists have highlighted. however, is what he then said: "Even if they're not actually filled and deployed today ..." Note the Even if qualifier. Isn't it as plain as the nose on your face? There is then this piece of nonsense from the above page Originally, the penultimate draft of the Iraq dossier had also suggested Saddam Hussein was likely to use WMD only in self defence. However, the Hutton Inquiry was told that a paragraph was re-written at the request of Mr Blair's Chief of Staff, Jonathan Powell, who e-mailed Alastair Campbell and others in Number 10 that it could be "a bit of a problem. It is true that a draft of the dossier did say that if under threat Iraq is likely to use its WMD and they did change the wording to make the phrase more direct. However, what the BBC has reported is tantamount to a lie: I think they have grossly misrperesented what happened. Overall, I thought the programme was interesting and both Andrew Gilligan and Greg Dyke came out of it astonishingly badly: I never trusted Gilligan to be honest and now I think Dyke should resign. Panorama made a relatively impartial programme that should, however, have been aimed at a post Hutton scenario rather than a pre Hutton scenario. DW

Michael Blake has helped me to track down another one of my ridiculous File Not Found errors. Thanks Michael: my site is a better place now that you've been there and held out the hand of friendship. DW

Nicey, of NiceCupOfTeaAndASitDown, wrote as follows: I'm very flattered that the Wife and I are 'wackbags', Hoorah! DW

There's web sites and there's web sites! Take a look at this one and be amazed: NiceCupOfTeaAndASitDown. This is a web site all about biscuits and it gets my vote! There's a biscuit quiz that will have you reeling. There's a biscuit blog written by the Wife. There's a biscuit of the week feature. There's biscuits you've never heard of but will desperately want to find and try. Well done to the wackbags who thought of all of that: the cracking title's just the start of it. DW

I've been at it again! Following my meanderings on the web and talking to a few people this week I realised that I needed a new page ... and here it is: The Selling of Duncan Williamson You NEED to go to that page to see some of things that I get up to that will convince you that I am the man for that job you want doing to very high standards and in double quick time. Don't forget that you need to pay the going rate for the job too. I'm waiting for you! DW

One of those priceless I don't believe it moments happened last night. Sitting with the family eating away when there was a knock on the door and a tall young chap presented himself by standing a metre away from the door, standing sideways on to me. He blurted that he'd been down at number 111 and he knew that our house was new and he knew that we probably didn't want new windows and he knew that he was probably wasting his time but had we ever considered fitting new windows even though he knew that the house was new and that we probably didn't want anything but had we considered it? Maybe next year? I politely said no and we parted company. Mirth and merriment in the W household. Knock, knock, knock! Hello, not so tall, very thin beard thrusts leaflet at me and says you've probably heard of us, Reg Molehusband (or someone I'd never heard of) soap star advertises us on the telly, we're selling French windows and doors and they will make a lasting impression on the house and he knew that the house was new but had we considered it? I said your friend has just been here ... he stopped for a second ... I said young and tall ... he said short hair, glasses ... I said yes ... he said that's Nick, oh Nick was here ... so are you considering fitting French windows in the near future? I said we've already got them thanks. Oh, thanks for your time anyway! Who sent these people to a brand new housing estate to sell such things? Moreover, having got here hadn't they got the message after around, let's say, six properties? Life's like that as the Reader's Digest says! DW

Christopher wanted to know my views on the application of Max Weber's work to the work of call centres. I told him I'm not an expert but I'd have a look around. Here are some general Weber pages: sorry but I can't be more specific I'm afraid. Let's start here and follow up with more from the same author A lengthy page but it has some useful looking links at the end: some of which follow. Very long page: I didn't read it all! This page argues that Weber's view of the Protestant Work Ethic is fundamentally flawed. From Oz, Weber on Capitalism Also from Oz, Weber on Bureaucracy Bullet points of the major aspects of Weber and his work: could be useful as part of a mind map. The MacDonaldisation of Society Social interaction and social structure: again a bit listy so might be useful as ideas for headings. Is Weber still relevant? Critique of Weber An abstract of Call centre management: is service quality a priority? Looks highly targeted but it needs a subscription. There you are Christopher: hope it provides some nuggets of gold! DW

Tony asked what I know about real life implementation of activity based costing/management. Well, I've done it in real life many times as I designed and implemented my product cost spreadsheet systems in around 90 SMEs. Take a look, too, at my book Cost & Management Accounting ISBN 0-13-205923-1, chapter 7. In there you can read a few examples, albeit old now, of where ABC was tried ... not only successes but failures too. There is also a discussion on the implementation of ABC in the UK, the USA and France: big differences. I give references to many of the original papers in this discussion. However, a trawl of the web has revealed the following useful links: Another one of Chris Lamb's brilliant resource lists at UNL: Chris offers fantastic services in this respect! ABC systems at Anglian Water Several links relating to LYJ Liu at Newcastle Business School. Can't verify them as they need a subscription to read them but if your library has a subscription to them they could prove useful. Another one needing a subscription but here is the abstract: Activity-based cost management in financial services industry Here are some very useful looking PDF files that I've skimmed and that I think are all from the USA but none the worse for that. http://www.mixmbb.org/en/mbb_issues/09/Articles/Activity-Based%20Costing%20and%20Savings.PDF http://www.rand.org/publications/MR/MR1066/MR1066AppD.pdf http://www2.newpaltz.edu/~roztockn/portland03.pdf http://www2.newpaltz.edu/~roztockn/washington00.pdf http://www.ustreas.gov/offices/domestic-finance/usps/pdf/Holsen.pdf http://www.mikon.com/RTCM3.pdf I hope these are useful. DW

Want to read all about Community Interest Companies and a bit about Social Enterprises? Look no further, it all starts here. go to that page and look under Sundry my pearls of wisdom. A sorry call from a friend yesterday to tell me what has happened to their name in their passport. Blake has been transposed into Bleak! Many a true word! Mrs W was watching a programme on the telly yesterday about Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. A psychologist was trundled out and he put up a picture of the happy couple and said "This is the best full face picture of Brad there has ever been ..." It isn't as it gave a very unflatteringly unbalanced view of his jowls and made him look as if the left side of his face was much larger than the right side, "Just look at the way Jennifer is looking adoringly at her husband ... in that subservient way" Honestly, she was not looking at Brad at all: it was so obvious. I dread to think how much they paid that Pycho to say such ridiculous things. I would have done a much better job if only they'd asked. By the way, I am looking for work and will happily consider all reasonable offers: writing articles, case studies and so on is what I want to do. I will consider other good offers of work too of course. I will travel anywhere in the world, too, as that is what I have been doing since 1988! Email me at any time. Speaking of jobs, though, the phone rang yesterday: a recruitment agency that I had worked for said they needed someone for a week to ... ready ... load boxes onto a lorry: 6am - 2pm for five days. The rate of pay was FIFTH of what I earned for the last job. I declined their offer. DW

Yippee! I've almost sorted out my BlogArchive situation! Scroll down this page to the bottom (just hit the End key will do) to see a complete listing of my archive files. Just have to sort out the final URL of the first half of them and then we're up and away again. No idea why blogger.com's own coding wouldn't work and don't know why I put up with it for so long. DW

Have you ever had a stye on your eye? I used to get them all of the time when I was around 14 - 16 years old. Absolute corkers they were. People used to think they were black eyes that I got as a result of fighting: "What's the other chap like?" the postmaster said to me once! When I didn't have a stye, I had boils. Massive, red, pustulating boils on my neck or on my arm. I still have a small scar when my best ever boil resided: my doctor described it as "... a beauty!" I used to spend ages squeezing out the green pus: ages, you wouldn't believe! Anyway, that scabby past of mine isn't the subject of this meandering. Young Master W had a stye on his eye earlier on this week and Mrs W showed me her "cure". Take one of these and wave it with a circular motion in front of the offending eye. That's it. Cured. Don't forget, you heard it first here! DW

George wrote to tell me that when he was trying to buy some things from my eshop, there was blip with my PayPal buttons ... thanks George, this is all sorted out now. Such unsolicited help is much appreciated. DW

Have you ever noticed in the modern film: 1 if anyone ever does any typing on screen, they can type at least at 50 words a minute. The best was "Scotty" in a Start Trek film who typed at 200+ words a minute on a keyboard that must have been seriously unfamiliar to him as he did this by travelling back from the future to the present day. Surely, the keyboard will evolve. If you are a computer hacker in a film, you sweat a bit, swivel in your obligatory swivel chair and crack every single code known to man within minutes ... even Fermat's Last Theorem is well within your grasp. 2 if anyone ever does any packing, they never fold anything as packing only ever follows an argument, an ultimatum and running away or a threat thereof. This means that the world's most expensive dress, shirt or suit can be flung on top of the world's least expensive dish cloth but no one seems to care. No one ever says, "Do you realise that your blouse will need ironing when you get to your hotel?" or "Come on, love, that's no way to treat a D&G LBD now is it? Here, let me fold it for you." 3 if anyone has a bad dream they always suddenly sit bolt upright absolutely dripping with sweat and then sit glassy eyed for as long as necessary whilst hyperventilating. If they are sharing their bed with someone they only ever wake up slowly and lie propped up on one elbow and say something like, "Something the matter, darling". I think I would say "What the @!$*** has happened. J*sus!". This applies to adults who have seen the devil incarnate and taken tea with him only to find the secrets of the dark side now reside in their shirt. This also applies to children whose Harry Potter books have may have been mislaid for a second or two. Any offers of more? Although I am aware that there are entire lists of these things but these are my three of the moment. DW

I have just finished reading The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown and over the next few days I will post and you will be able to read my review of it. In general it's a good book and it's both detective story and religio historical mystical cryptographical ... well done! A lot of hearts do a lot of pounding, which seems to be very common in the modern novel and in the modern film. There's an online cryptography game on Dan Brown's website that provides a reasonably tricky set of questions to solve. One lucky winner will be drawn from the hat on Good Morning America on 12 January 2004 and will be whisked off to Paris. I cracked all the codes and entered my details to find ... you have to be American to enter. I left my details and put my friend's Californian Zip code instead of my UK Post Code. If I win, I will apologise but I didn't see any disclaimers anywhere and I felt they ought to know that I cracked all of their codes. By the way, if you have a go and want some help and you are American, I will help you for a mutually agreeable fee. Can't say fairer than that can I? DW

Following on from my New Year's Day computer tosh, I had another two hour stint yesterday. The day before, I found that despite being protected against viruses, I had acquired two of the barstewards. I got rid of them but then in the middle of my latest two hour session, I found that I had another bleeding virus. Time to act: I upgraded my anti virus software from freeby to a paid for service. I did that, ran it and it gave me the all clear. When I logged on this morning I let it run again and it didn't report any problems. Moreover, I opened up Outlook and switched on to Braodband and IE and all worked well enough: first time for ages and I hope I haven't spoken too soon! Also during the two hour session I deleted all of the software that either I don't use much and/or that I don't really know where it came from. They all went, although I do have the *.exe files to reinstall them if I want to. I still have the shutdown problem with Windows, however, that seems to be well known and that has my computer saving my settings, closing down and then just hanging with a blue screen and a movable mouse cursor ... nothing else can work and a manual switch off seems to solve the problem. Still, I have to hang around to flick the switch. I'm told it's due to a driver conflict somewhere on my system and I did install some software that Microsoft recommended but it only solved the problem once. Ah, Gates! DW

Here's a bit of a whinge. Have you seen that programme on British television called Room 101 ... very George Orwell but the idea is that a "celebrity" goes on the telly and moans about his or her pet likes and dislikes. These objects of hatred are then consigned to a dustbin and we all live happily ever after. Well, here are my four items, people in fact. Dale Winton Graham Norton Charles Ingram Chris Tarrant Dale Winton has been reviled on this blog before: I find him odious and talentless yet he adorns the television screen ad nauseam. He appeared on prime time Christmas Day television on BBC1 and again later that day; but he came in the top three of a poll recently as one of the three people that viewers most want to be thrown off the telly. I would have voted for him to be thrown off too. Sorry to be so negative but I don't like his lack of personality wafting across my screen. Moreover, he published an autobiography a while ago in which he came out as Gay. Then beggar me, two or three months later he married a young lady. @rse! Graham Norton is one of those wild people whose real persona is probably 180 degrees removed from their public persona. I don't like his antics, his effeminacy, his loud jackets. He was also in the top three of the poll that wanted rid of Winton. @rse! Michael Barrymore was the other top three candidate for being chucked off the telly but I am indifferent to him as he as almost sunk for the moment. If he came back I would still be indifferent. Major Charles Ingram is the man who was found guilty of having cheated on Who Wants to be a Millionaire?: having taken along a knowledgeable man to sit in the audience and who coughed at the right and wrong answers. As Ingram thought about his answers, his friend would cough to say yes or no ... absolutely blatant and absolutely bang to rights. They were taken to court and lost. Ingram maintains his innocence. Then he was found guilty of attempting to defraud an insurance company ... all told a bad lot. Then lo and behold I saw that he was on the telly as a "celebrity" taking part in some kind of poxy reality TV programme. Needless to say I didn't watch it but if reminded me of Christine and Neil Hamilton, that reviled couple who are making a very handsome living out of being both bankrupt and odious. @rses! Chris Tarrant hosts Who wants to be a Millionaire? and had I been writing this rant last year or the year before or the year before ... he would have been on my list of get rids. For what it's worth, he got onto children's television in the 1970s I think it was on the strength of his having applied and having been a school teacher. I always felt he had no depth to his character, his sense of humour is immature and his ability to carry on a decent dialogue is woeful. I heard a review of his morning radio programme on Capital Radio recently and he was generally slated for that by all and sundry: ratings and quality couldn't go much lower than he has taken them was the general concensus. Still, three out of four of these men are doing very well for themselves and the fourth one probably will become a millionaire now that he has become a "celebrity". The word celebrity has become a misnomer now. In the old days we had stars then we needed a superlative, superstar, then we needed megastar ... now they are all celebrities. To be a celebrity means that one is celebrated, surely. Who celbrates the people discussed here I wonder? DW

Heard of Bollinger Champagne? It's the one that James Bond and I both drink. Anyway, I realised last night that BOLLINGER is an anagram of an L of a Bog Liner. Don't know why! DW

Happy New Year to all our readers! Christmas came and went and I got a few books to read and set up the family with some playing cards, dominoes and a solitaire game ... for those long winter nights in front of the radiator panel: well, who has a fire these days? OK, so we have but that wouldn't be funny and post modernistic would it? An American friend has suggested that I turn my talents to writing smutty stories and selling them. How does this sound? As he looked tenderly towards the object of his desires, he licked his lips as his heart pounded and he dreamed of sliding his hand gingerly down her upper torso towards her little crock of gold! Drove down to Portsmouth the other day and having missed my final turn off from the motorway last time, I felt that it was my duty to take the turn off immediately BEFORE the correct one this time. Tried to retrieve the situation and missed the oportunity to get back on track but only because of my innate ineptitude, otherwise it would have been fine. Anyway, I drove along cursing and swearing at myself (I've got this down to a fine art now as I know exactly what to say, how to say it and in what order!) trying too look as if I knew how to get to Southsea. After 15 - 20 minutes of dodging and diving I came to the Marriott Hotel and, you've guessed it, the slip road back on to the motorway at the junction I just left ... in other words, dear reader, my navigational sense of beggar all took me in a complete circle! That was OK then and I arrived at my destination at exactly the same time as my visitees ... they had been delayed by about 40 minutes as he was taken by something in a shop. I said that God must have taken hold of my steering wheel and taken me on a tour of the nethers of outer Portsmouth while they meandered through a logistical retail experience. Then I spent around 8 hours successfully working on setting up and fettling a new laptop computer. Here's the ultimate irony, of course: the following day, yesterday, I got up to do my business and then had to spend almost SEVEN BLOODY HOURS trying to get my own laptop working properly. Unknowingly a virus had got into my system and it took me a while to realise that, cos I'm protected (sounds as if I'm protected by a condom with a tiny prick in it!!!); and then it was downhill all the way. I logged on late last night and it was playing up again so in my sleep I decided that I would do a RESTORE. "Oh no thou shall not" sayeth Bill Gates III "thy RESTORE function hast been RESET so that thou hast only one RESTORE point and that be the point at which thou hast fiddled a bit yesterday morning. Go back to thy old ways and repent. The way of the lord thy Gates is good!" So I took a more pragmatic approach. I did what I normally do and then left it to go and have breakfast. Sort yourself out I mind read at it: I couldn't do the usual verbal shout, rant and rave since others were still sleeping chez moi. It did sort itself out too ... so far anyway: otherwise you wouldn't be reading this! Happy new year anyway; and that's how mine has started. DW

Following my post of23 December at 10:16:48 am, here is the press release from the Leasowe Castle Hotel: I wrote to them so was on their distribution list for this. The press release starts with this: Over the past two days it has emerged that there has been a serious misunderstanding between Alan Tudball and Leasowe Castle with regard to his cancelled wedding which was due to be held in April of this year ... Click here to read on ...PRESS RELEASE from leasowe castle Looks like a happy ending. DW

Ever felt outraged at the antics of a business? Here's a story that should make your blood boil: Hotel sues injured soldier over cancelled wedding and again at Iraq hero being sued Here are the post and phone details of the hotel The Leasowe Castle Leasowe Road Moreton Wirral Merseyside CH46 3RF t: 0151 606 9191 t: 0151 678 5551 To write to the hotel over the internet go to their web site, click on the contact link at the top left of the page and write to them like I did. DW

Speaking of Santa Claus, here's a page that tells his story. Worried that Santa's outfit's red because Coca Cola decided it should be? Think again as you unravel the history of this benevolent chap and learn that the name Santa Claus comes directly from the Dutch sinterklaas and not from the Yorkshire dialect "ee bah gum"; but even that is more romantic sounding than the German name: Weihnachtsmann! Anyway, go here to read all about it: THE HISTORY OF SANTA CLAUS I can't vouch for the accuracy of the history lesson on that page, of course, but what the heck! Then again, click on the link at the bottom of that page to go here to learn a lot more about Christmas and its various traditions. DW

If you must spend your life on line why not spend part of that time googlewhacking? Here's what googlewhacking is: The object of Googlewhacking is to find two words which, when entered into the Google search engine without quotes, yield one and only one result ... It's a lot harder than you might expect, and of course, if you succeed in finding one and post it to http://www.googlewhack.com , within a very short time your whack will yield more than one result! Such is the ephemeral nature of the beast. (By the way, "ephemeral Googlewhack", without the quotes of course, yielded 35 results when I tried!) I tried duncan's nuts but that returned 1,510 hits: so, I'm not alone then! Some of the successful searches, around 256,000 reported so far are clever but many are just odd. The best result so far is 165 hits for jock mcplop! I got a few where there were no hits! Have a go and do better than I did! DW

I went to a school presentation evening last night and it went well enough although it was held in the gym and was decidedly parky (that's nippy, chilly or even cold if you've not heard that expression before!). The headmaster stole the opening part of the show with his yellow shirt and brown tie: can't imagine who his style guru is but they must have been having a night off. The kids were reasonably smartly turned out on average but I did find it surprising that some parents and children think it's suave to turn up to a formal presentation evening in torn jeans, horrifically untidy hair or wackily masticating chewing gum as they collected their awards. These events are often the highlight of a person's life in many ways and who needs someone else to make some kind of poxy statement and lower the tone? The senior girl's choir did well but I did wonder why they had chosen to sing nothing but songs from across the Pond: as if we don't have enough of our own songs to celebrate. They also had a large painting by the stage that included a prominent version of the Stars and Stripes: I don't get it. I do know that if this had been an American school or even a French or German one there would have been our own national flag in a prominent place of display. Not in good old modern Britain, you don't. Apart from that it was interesting to see that the most successful children at that school excelled both academically and as people: they spent a lot of their own time volunteering, organising, working in the community AND working hard at their school work. These young people have realised that they are in charge of their own lives: they don't wait for someone to tell them what to do, they just get up and do it. Ask these people if they are ever bored, if they ever have nothing to do and do they ever just sit at home glued to the television. You know the answers. Well done them! I also believe that if you got to know these young achievers well enough you would find that they aren't especially privileged: they're not necessarily super smart either. Clever enough of course but the important point is that they drive themselves: they are smarter than the average for that reason. They will beat many of their contemporaries in many of life's races because of their positive attitude and they deserve it. The lesson is, get off your @rse and get on with it! DW

I thought I'd cracked this archiving lark by finally getting Blogger.com to accept my full archive path ... I have done the same thing many times but this time it worked EXCEPT that it then decided that the files didn't need the .html extension adding to the hyperlink. So I added the extension only to find that blogger then fouled up the name in another way. I will either be giving up on an archive or moving to another WeBlog site. Watch this space. DW

I have just come across two brilliant Christmas/New Year cards and feel the need to share them go to www.cardmaker.co.uk and take a look at Christmas Humour. Here's one of them: DW

A propos the way things happen, here is the copy of a contribution I made to a discussion board to do with Economics and Business Studies Teaching: A couple of issues of interest: well, I think so anyway! On my web site at www.duncanwil.co.uk/solvlp.html I have a demonstration of the use of Excel's SOLVER function: a linear programming maximisation problem. Over the last couple of days I have been in correspondence with a visitor to my site and as a result I have added a useful section on plotting linear programming graphs in Excel. I know a lot of people have difficulties with plotting LP graphs on paper, let alone in Excel so this addition should prove useful for many. Your feedback will be welcome! Tutor2u.net have as their chart of the day a comparison of the GfK Consumer Confidence Index and Base Interest Rates and their headline reads Consumer confidence drops sharply in November following base rate rise. I think this is an excellent discussion case for anyone wanting to draw students’ attention to the development and presentation of an argument. On the face of it there is a high degree of correlation between the fall in the confidence index and the rise in base rates in November of this year. Moreover, go to http://www.martinhamblin-gfk.com/library/news_item.asp?NewsID=118&usa= which is the source of tutor2u.net’s data for the consumer confidence index and you will see this: Roger Wright, Director of Martin Hamblin GfK, commented: 'We are seeing consumer confidence falling again from its peak in July after a period of uncertainty. The increase in interest rates has probably affected how consumers perceive whether it is the right time to make major purchases.' Is this the final word on the subject? No it isn’t! Take a look at the rest of tutor2u.net’s graph and you will see that rises and falls in consumer confidence can be absolutely independent of changes in the base rate: Dec 2001 – Dec 2002 being an excellent example of where this is demonstrated. At other stages you will see that a fall in base rates has apparently led to a fall in consumer confidence: see Jul 2001 – Oct 2001 for evidence of that. So, read more from Martin Hamblin GfK to appreciate more of a balanced view of the consumer confidence index than the headline view from tutor2u.net: Martin Hamblin GfK provide us with a variety of additional reasons why consumer confidence might change in addition to changes in the base rate. Finally, in terms of the presentation of a stilted debate, take a look at the presentation of the value added measures relating to Key Stages 2 and 3 that begins here: http://www.dfes.gov.uk/performancetables/vap_02/docB.shtml Follow the links from page to page and you will find a huge amount of discussion on this topic … but there’s something missing! There are no real comparators to the value added data. All that we see are last year versus this year but there is nothing to help us to appreciate how and why value might have been added to or subtracted from. Get your better students to discuss the additional information needed by parents, teachers and government to provide much more balance to the debate. Otherwise we will all believe that Grammar Schools are the only ones managing their value added effectively: again the headline comments from today’s television and radio. In reality, of course, when all information is taken into account Grammar Schools might be performing badly. Let’s see absolute and relative data, as appropriate, for SSRs, revenue expenditure levels, capital expenditure, levels of administrative support, repairs and maintenance expenditures and more and only then we will see better balance. You could also ask the question of why industry hasn’t reported value added in its annual reports and accounts for a decade or more now. Best wishes DW

Maureen asked: I was looking at the solver example on your website. Can you tell me how you created the graphical solution. I have been trying something similar using Excel's XY scatter and just can't get it work. Thanks Maureen D I answered by telling Maureen to go back to www.duncanwil.co.uk/solvlp.html to see the addition I have made to the page in which I take you through plotting the graph step by step as LP graphs can be horrible to plot in Excel! In addition, I almost forgot to point out that I prepared a PowerPoint Presentation a while ago to help people to prepare Linear Programming graphs: it's here and it's an animated presentation so all you need to do is to start the slide show then sit back and relax. Another excellent service from yours truly! DW

I know, I know, I rant on about broken links on my site but leave the archive of this blog unreachable. I'm doing it, I'm doing it! I can't fathom it at all so I'm giving it another crack! I've tried to change the path again but blogger.com updates on the batch basis so it could be 24 hours before the changes take effect. Trust me! I have just been correcting a few more File Not Found Errors and can happily reveal that the following pages SHOULD run error free now: spreaddes.html split.html intpiv.html cbeh.html ... although I can run this and couldn't find the error that was in my error log file and I have uploaded the various jpg and gif files that were missing from here and there. Thanks to everyone who reported errors and although I am sure there are more I am working to get rid of them. DW

The postman brought me two copies of an article I have just had published. If you can get to a university or college library or are a member of the Chartered Institute of Management Accountants, take a look at December's issue of Financial Management and on pages 30 - 33 you will see Welcome to Sarajevo: all about some cost accounting work I did in and around Sarajevo in Bosnia-Herzegovina and written by yours truly. DW

One of those "eeesh!" moments arrived today. I read an article in a magazine that included some moving average and seasonality calculations. I was interested in working on the data and set up a spreadsheet to replicate the work I had found. I am pretty sure I found a simple but important mistake in the results in the article so I wrote to the author with all due deference to suggest that there may be a mistake in his article or there may be something I didn't follow but I said I think you might check your work. The author wrote back as follows: All the calculations were carried out using an Excel worksheet. I'm fairly confident they are OK but there may be some rounding errors. Astonishing reply in my opinion. I said to him that there were rounding errors in his work, that was obvious but not important; and I pointed out where there is likely to be an error; but to suggest that because the work had been done on an Excel spreadsheet and therefore he is "fairly confident" that it's all OK was a surprise from one so exalted ... not galvanised into checking it to dispel all doubt! DW

A question just came in relating to my ratio analysis work hosted by Biz/ed. Here's the question and my response follows: From Mark: I believe there's an error on page: http://www.bized.ac.uk/compfact/ratios/ror3.htm where it says: Did you notice that we use the Equity Shareholders' Funds instead of Capital Employed? In fact, they are different names for the same thing! We could call the ratio the Return on Shareholders' Funds (ROSF) just as easily if we wanted; but generations of accountants and students only know it as ROCE. Isn't it true that Capital Employed is shareholders funds plus long-term liabilities, so that ROCE = ROSF only if a firm has no debt, no gearing, and is 100% equity financed? My reply: There is always a worry when one discusses capital employed and for years now I have tended to solve the problem by giving a very general definition of it, such as the one that Mark has pointed out. For A level, 1st year undergraduate and foundation professional accounting work I think the general definition is fine. For higher level work, 2nd year undergraduate and upwards, I would have no hesitation in defining capital employed much more tightly: maybe this is Mark's problem as he seems to be a university student or lecturer. Just to try to prove my point and to reassure Mark and all Biz/ed visitors, I took a look at three definitions of CE from three books that I often use. Here is what I found: 1. A company's capital employed is shown by taking the figure for total assets from the balance sheet. 2. Capital Employed. A measure of the total value of the operating assets of an equity. different measurements are appropriate for different purposes. In some cases, owners’ equity is the appropriate measurement: in an incorporated company, this will be called ‘shareholders’ capital employed’. In some cases, long term borrowings may be added to owners’ equity, while in others dividends payable by the entity and taxation payable by it may be added. 3. Capital employed (in trading) = Share Capital + reserves + all borrowings including obligations under finance leases, bank overdraft + minority interests + provisions – associates and investments. Government Grants are not included. 4. Capital employed (overall) Associates and investments are not deducted, while the overall profit figure includes income from investments and the company’s share of the profits of associated companies, in addition to trading profit. Sources 1 John Ellis and David Williams Corporate Strategy and Financial Analysis Pitman Publishing 2 Derek French Dictionary of Accounting Terms Financial Training 3 and 4 Geoffrey Holmes and Alan Sugden Interpreting Company Reports and Accounts Prentice Hall It wouldn’t be a problem for me to add the above to the page that Mark refers to and I could revise it a bit to make it fit more seamlessly if you wish. Let me know! Otherwise, I hope Mark has found that section to be useful and I am grateful for the opportunity of discussing this issue with both of you. DW

Accountancy student Andrew and I have been corresponding recently: he's just taken a cost accounting exam with the AAT. Anyway, he's had the life confused out of his with the standard costing volume and related variances so I thought it might be useful for everyone to see my reply. Take a look at this page to see what we talked about. DW

I answered this question today and you can find this information, with live hyperlinks at www.duncanwil.co.uk/pest.html ... I have now got to discuss the limitations of PEST analysis but am finding it hard getting any info on it. Here's what I replied ... sorry but I'm pushed for time and haven't made any of the URLs into live hyperlinks: just copy and paste into your browser to do that. I started by interrogating GOOGLE worldwide for the limitations of PEST and got as many sites to do with greenfly and leaf mould as I did to do with PEST analysis. I then got rid of the limitations of part of the search and fared no better. So, I interrogated pages from the UK section of www.google.co.uk for pest analysis and here is what I think is a sample of the best that can be found there. This is a sweep through the various techniques that are discussed in the standard texts: nothing directly to do with the limitations of PEST analysis but it might spark off a train of thought. http://tbs-home.tees.ac.uk/staff/u0000514/M&S2 Wk 3 03.ppt http://www.netmba.com/strategy/pest/ begins with this "A PEST analysis is an analysis of the external macro-environment that affects all firms. P.E.S.T. is an acronym for the Political, Economic, Social, and Technological factors of the external macro-environment. Such external factors usually are beyond the firm's control and sometimes present themselves as threats. For this reason, some say that "pest" is an appropriate term for these factors. However, changes in the external environment also create new opportunities and the letters sometimes are rearranged to construct the more optimistic term of STEP analysis." and ends with this "... it may be difficult to forecast future trends with an acceptable level of accuracy. In this regard, the firm may turn to scenario planning techniques to deal with high levels of uncertainty in important macro-environmental variables." Some clues, therefore, as to what limitations we might be talking about. There's a relatively comprehensive introduction to PEST analysis here http://www.businessballs.com/pestanalysisfreetemplate.htm It also spends a lot of time comparing PEST with SWOT ... worth a read and might also spark something. IF you have the time and energy here's a real example of the application of PEST analysis http://www.mod.uk/linked_files/wsa/phase1-anx_h-i.pdf 38 pages relating to submarines being withdrawn from service. There's a hint on the potential limitations of this application of PEST analysis on page 3, paragraph 5 "... It should be noted that the costs given take no account of risk, growth, profit or VAT ..." Take a look at this http://www.marketing-intelligence.co.uk/help/Q&A/question14.htm and you will see that the final paragraph discusses some of the limitations of PEST analysis. There is also a link at the end of this page where you are invited to download a more detailed paper on PEST and SWOT analysis: you need to register in order to do that and the paper you will then be able to download is fine but nothing new. Here are two PowerPoint Presentations from Durham that relate to real cases and that again might be useful introductions to the subject: http://www.dur.ac.uk/p.j.allen/smarkets.ppt http://www.dur.ac.uk/p.j.allen/258,3,PEST Analysis The second of the above presentations is a nuisance as the author has left all of the click, click presentation gizmos in that aren’t especially web friendly … you’ll see what I mean when you get there! Happy reading and happy weekend. Hope that’s useful. DW

Went with Mrs W to see the Nurse at our local Surgery this week and this caught my eye. In the corridor near the nurse's room there is a wall mounted height measurer. Stand with your back to the window frame in this case as that's where the measure has been attached and slide the scale up and down until it rests on top of your bonce. Take a look at my artistic representation of reality: Notice, the floor immediately beneath the measure is uneven. In order to be measured properly, one needs to lift up one's right leg to counter the slope of the floor that begins immediately below the measure. Alternatively, just stand there and be measured inaccurately. The wonders of modern applied science! Not a massively serious problem but a bit more thought could have been taken! DW

Car insurance renewal time came and I decided that I didn't need comprehensive insurance following my accident of earlier this year when my car was written off and I had to shell out £2,000 to get myself a decent set of replacement wheels. That decision saved me £120 for the year. They suggested that they might be able to help me with my home insurance too and, by jingo, they did: for better cover my broker has saved me 50% of my buildings and contents insurance. Welcome to modern rip off Britain where the unwary simply don't know that the deal that someone did is nowhere near the optimum. As I am now insured for everything with one company, I got a further £20 discount on the car insurance. Still, someone else will now take these savings from me for another and as yet unknowable reason since that's the way of the world! DW

My finger's almost healed now and it's no longer painful, the nail has grown back by about 2 millimetres and the skin has repaired itself by about 50% of what's needed for a full recovery! Good news, eh? DW

The Moral Maze programme on Radio 4 last night was an outrage. We were treated to a long list of angry sounding people discussing whether Europe was becoming more anti semitic, whether the State of Israel should exist and whether anyone who believes that if Israel shouldn't exist they must automatically be branded anti semitic. The people presenting the arguments were all zealots and had clearly come to the programme with completely fixed positions. Some of the "witnesses" were treated badly in my opinion: the problem seems to have been that everyone knew everyone else or they knew everyone else's work and writings on this subject so they were like boxers who had been watching films of each other as they prepared for a fight! At one point someone wondered where the hate of Jewry had come from and likened it to racism ... for all of their learning they seemed ignorant of the fact that the Magna Carta contains references to Jews that are hardly flattering; and that was written in 1215, almost 800 years ago! I wish they could have found a better topic. I have to confess that I am completely turned off by anything to do with this issue as it has been festering for decades and we are, wretchedly and unfortunately, no nearer a solution: billion of Pounds are wasted on this problem, too as the "best" brains in the political world can find no solution. Then the BBC invites these bad tempered people onto Radio 4 to discuss whether the problem's getting worse or not! Waste of time DW

I am horrified at how Britain is fast becoming the country in which we speak American English with a British accent. On BBC radio news yesterday we were told that Birmingham has taken delivery of a temporary Ferris Wheel display. What on earth is a Ferris Wheel? A Ferris Wheel is what we used to call a Big Wheel and we used the term Big Wheel for many decades. All of a sudden the BBC has decided that we need to call it a Ferris Wheel. Today we heard from the Today programme on Radio 4 that Donald Rumsfeld is in Afghanistan today and Louise Ducet reported that there is a problem in part of Afghanistan as certain War Lords make mischief. I wrote to Sky News a couple of years ago about using the term War Lord since I feel it adds a false legitimacy to what is really only mass murder and general mayhem. Sky News wrote back saying that they had changed their wording, that day at least, as a result of my missive, during the rest of that day's reporting. There is no such thing as a war lord in my mind, they are soldiers, terrorists, freedom fighters or what you like but the term Lord should really be reserved for something more sublime than butchery. DW

Went to Brimingham yesterday, an early start to get to my destination by 9 am: did it with 20 minutes to spare. On the opposite carriageway of the M40 as I was wending my way, there was the remnants of an accident: between junctions 12 and 13. That accident had blocked the nearside lane and was causing a blockage of around 5 miles: traffic queuing, at a standstill, for up to five miles. I heard on the radio that this accident had happened at least at 7 am. As I started back they announced on the radio that the problem had gone so I wended my way back and went down the M40 happily. However, I came to join a 4.5 mile slow moving and sometimes stopping queue FOUR HOURS AFTER THE ORIGINAL ACCIDENT. As I got to the place where the accident had happened, I saw that the lorry/ies invovled were then off the carriageway but we we had still been slowed right down. I estimated that I lost 30 minutes of my time. This set me thinking that relatively simple problems such as a motor accident can snarl up an entire motorway for upwards of four hours. By the time I got there the problem was poor but not horrific. Just imagine the people who were trapped by the accident just after it happened ... how many deliveries were delayed, how many people were late for work or dropping off the kids? What were the real costs and knock on effects as a result of what was probably caused by bad driving and/or poor mechanical maintenance. Answers on a postcard please! DW

I went to Swansea last Saturday, 29 November, to see daughter Fran swim in an International Swimming Event. She did well enough but the most important point is that she will remain in Swansea until today, Thursday 4 Dec, with her coach so that he can work on her style and stroke. The National Wales Swimming Pool is a magnificent affair: 50 metre pool together with diving/learning pool and outside there are hockey pitches, rugby pitches ... a marvellous set up. Take a look: The sound system is marvellous too and the "DJ" had my taste in music. Well, until it got to the Tom Jones Fest that is! Then again we were in Wales. Fran was staying at the Marriott Hotel and that's quite a nice affair and we did lunch there! Can't say I recommend the veggie butty but it filled a corner. One rubbishEnglish gripe is that the menu says that the sandwiches come with chips ... when the butty arrived it arrived with CRISPS. Aaaaagh! I wanted CHIPS. If you're watching this, Marriott people, PLEASE help people like me to understand what you mean. This was my first trip to Swansea and it's a breeze to get there: just get onto the M4 and drive for around 2 hours then turn left and you're there. I didn't have much time to look around but there is a massive newly developed central area and a fet old fashioned terraced houses. The setting on the way in is very attractive: at the end of the valleys system of South Wales. It was dark and drizzly all the way down from Abingdon until I got into Wales and then the sun shone brightly and that lightened up the vista! DW

Pleased myself today as I managed to fix the rear windscreen heater in the car today. Courtesy of an online discussion list of fellow Beemer owners I was given detailed instructions of what to do and how to do it ... then did it! Here is photographic proof that I was in there and at it! Happy motoring! DW

A relatively minor problem such as the one I caused myself yesterday just goes to highlight one thing: aren't we normally healthy, mobile people a pile of moaners? My finger is a bit of a mess: I will be slightly incapacitated for a few days as it sorts itself out. There are people whose entire lives are dominated by massive inconveniences that most of us can barely dream about let alone experience. So, if you hear me whingeing about my finger, just remember what I just said! By the way, let's record a hearty well done to those plucky rugby players of ours who have just won the Rugby Union World Cup for the first time ever: beating Australia in the final in Sydney by 20 points to 17. I watched most of the match as it was a decent affair. Well done lads! DW

How many of those now I don't believe I wanted to do that moments have you had? A few, eh? I had one of those moments a couple of hours or so ago: I sliced the end of my finger off. Honest, a genuine chunk: nail, skin and underlying tissue. I almost took a pic of it for you but it took me so long to stem the bleeding that I changed my mind. When Mrs W heard about the incident she wanted me to go to the hospital ... it's bad enough but there's nothing for them to stitch or anything so all they would do is what I did. Anyway, here is a pic of a harmless view of what's left. DW

So I've been to Bristol now. Bristol's a place I've been past many times but for some reason have never been into before. My destination was really simple to find: off the M4 onto the M32, follow the road in a straight line and turn left into Berkeley Square and there you are. Couldn't park but there was a decent multi storey car park just round the corner that had a weird pricing policy. Berkeley Square is a nice looking place to work and I imagine in Spring, Summer and early Autumn it's lovely. Didn't get any chance to take any snaps although I did take my digital camera with me. There is a huge church that rises up out of the ground as you approach Berkeley Square from West End and that was snap worthy but I blew it. What is this life if full of care we don't have time to stand and stare? That's me for ya! I didn't get to appreciate the city at all except for one thing. I left the car park and turned left as I'd entered it from that self same direction ... the ONLY road sign I saw AT ALL could have come from the 1930s (cast iron sign, white background, black lines, knobbly glass bead reflectors) and pointed towards Gloucester so I went that way. I didn't see any more signs for around 20 minutes as I edged along the road heading nearer and nearer to rush hour. All of a sudden we came to a bifurcation (that's a fork in the road and that's a Royal "we" as I was alone!) and they announced that the M5 and M4 were thataway ... then it became the M4 and M5 were thataway ... OK small point but which came first the M5 or the M4? The M5 as it turned out. That route was sub optimal but it got me back on track and I got home safely enough so that can't be bad can it? Thought you'd like to know that! DW

For the first time in 18 years I had a migraine yesterday and it was just as awful as always. It always starts the way it has since I had my first frightening atack when I was about 14 years old. I see lines, auras apparently, in my eyes and then I go half blind for a while. Within an hour or so I start being sick and then I can do nothing but sleep and vomit. I have to vomit until my stomach is completely empty. I had a headache yesterday but that's not normal for me and it was no where near as severe as the headaches that other migraine sufferers describe. I can't eat, I could only sip at some water after I'd stopped feeling sick and I just have to wait to sleep it off. Today is also normal as I mope around a little bit with remnants of nausea, remnants of a headache and a bit of a feeling of torpor. Tomorrow will be a much better day! What triggered the migraine? I think chocolate is a trigger for me and I'd just eaten a couple of the blighters! I also have a passionate dislike of bright lights and yesterday morning was a very bright day. So, sitting in a very bright room with two delicious chocolates suitably ensconced could have been the problem. For the first time ever I was at home when an attack started so I was able to go to bed immediately and rest. My eye problems passed very quickly this time and maybe that was because of the rest factor. Otherwise, it was the same as always. It's awful and as any migraine sufferer will probably tell you, it's a dreaded affliction as it's always at the back of your mind. Even though it's 18 years since my last attack and it was 14 years prior to that that I had my previous attack, I know instantly that it's arrived and I know what's coming from then on. You don't forget! DW

I have just had a scan done of dozens of search engines and here are some very encouraging results for my site. If you search for Duncan Williamson on the following search engines, this is how I am placed:

Engine	Placing
www.lycos.com	3
www.msn.com	6
www.yahoo.com	1
www.aol.com	2
www.netscape.com	2
www.excite.com	2
www.webcrawler.com	1
www.alltheweb.com	3
www.lycos.co.uk	1
www.altavista.co.uk	1
www.msn.co.uk	1
www.yahoo.co.uk	1
www.hotbot.co.uk	1
www.aol.co.uk	1
www.excite.co.uk	3
www.mirago.co.uk	2
www.freeserve.com	3
www.overture.com	1
www.allthesites.com	12
www.go.com	1
www.mamma.com	1

Not bad, eh? By the way, if you are interested in homoeopathic medicines and you go to France, you might care to pop into a pharmacy over there. On the basis of a sample of 5 or 6 different homoeopathic medicines, the French sell for around £0.60 - 0.80 what we sell in the UK for £3.75 - £4.00. It's a national outrage! Of course. DW

Here is an experiment. Call me mad or call me sad, you can choose which it is but since today is my birthday and I am not normally given to celebrating such events, I would like to receive from all of my readers a simple birthday wish. All you have to do is to click on the link that follows and then send the thing to me ... all automatic but you can add a message if you wish. Click here to send. That's all! Secondly, please take a look at this if you are even in the least bit interested in how the NHS works. It's my account of a morning spent at a hospital in the UK. DW

I know this much: Judge not that ye be not judged (taken from the Bible from the book of Matthew chapter 7 verse 1). However, I'm going to say this anyway. On Wednesday of this week I was walking through the town centre at a time when children should still have been at school when I came across a young boy walking through town with a woman whom I assumed to be his mother: the boy seemed to be around 12 or 13 years old and this is how he looked: seriously overweight baggy trousers tee shirt four or five sizes too big a baseball cap a ring hanging from his pierced eye brow This boy is coming to epitomise modern Britain where weak parents of single minded children are allowing those children to walk roughshod over everything they see and come up against. This boy is fat and I blame his parents for allowing him to be fat: I work hard with my own children if I think they have a problem with their diet and their exercise levels. The boy was wearing trousers and a sleeveless tee shirt: it was chilly and his mother ought to have made the child wear something more substantial. I don't like baseball caps on anyone but that's my personal preference but it set off this boys attitude and that turned me off, too. That such a young child could have had his body pierced, though, is as much of a crime as allowing him to become overweight. Doubtless the child will have a tattoo by the time he is 18 years old: another crime against the body in my opinion. These are my observations and opinions: I know many of you will think that I am a fuddy duddy who should lighten up a bit; but I can't. In a sense I want to protect these children from their weak and misguided parents and themselves. This nation is following the USA into obesity just as we have followed them into an appalling standard of spoken and written English. This nation has become one where it's no longer good enough, for example, to wear trainers but that they have to be a certain brand of trainers. The trainers are very expensive but yet their true manufacturing costs are very small: we allow ourselves to be cheated out of as much as £50 or £60 a pair in some cases as we pay for advertising, sportsmen's sponsorship deals, multi stage mark ups and retail profit margins. The boy in my story was wearing a "designer" baseball cap, a "designer" tee shirt; and probably "designer" trousers and trainers. Could his eye ring have been "designer" too? End of rant for now! DW

I'm back following a 10 drip to Provence, that's France you know! I've kept a sort of diary that will keep you riveted but first: Joyce from Korea wanted answers to a couple of IAS based questions: done and sent! Natalie from South Africe is receiving ongoing advice on the elements of budgets: doing that! Karin from Austria is receiving ongoing help on knowledge management: doing that! Tom describes himself as a Mature student struggling with bookkeeping and has asked for help with my specimen question ... I need to know which question he means! Sarah from Geordieland has started a dissertation relating to Marks and Spencer and we are discussing her overall plan: doing that! Clive from Birmingham is an accountant who has come across a fascinating Benford's Law type problem involving the Inland Revenue: looks to me as if the IR is making a mess of it and I am working with Clive to sort it all out: doing that! Andrew from Surrey wants a bit of technical help on the bookkeeping aspect of recording bad debts: doing that! Mahmood from India wants to know why LIFO is being taken out of IAS 2: this is what I told him ... Hi Mahmood, Good question: here’s the answer! LIFO was banned in many countries, eg the UK, for a long time and then IAS 2 came along and allowed it. However, after just a few years even the IASC is about to disallow LIFO. The reason is that LIFO provides an organisation with a potential taxation advantage over alternative stock valuation methods. To prove that this is true, set up a simple stock valuation question for yourself by inventing some purchases, usages, costs and sales of some raw materials and then prepare the stock record card using … make sure that you build in cost inflation FIFO LIFO AvCo then prepare the Trading and Profit and Loss Account and compare the answers you get. This will help you to see what LIFO can be a problem. However, the USA has always liked and allowed LIFO and continues to do so as far as I know! Let me know if you need any more help. Best wishes Watch out for the French Trip Diary: a week in Provence I'm calling it! DW

Marks and Spencer, UK Retailer, has been at odds with HM Customs and Excise over VAT on teacakes: no really, it's gripping the nation! M&S argued that teacakes should be zero rated for VAT purposes and HMC&E agreed. What they disagreed on, however, was the recovery of the VAT already paid on the teacakes already sold that had been subject to the tax. M&S said: we overpaid therefore we should get it back. HMC&E said: you overpaid but you cannot give it back to the people who actually paid it. In the first move of its kind, Customs invoked laws on unjust enrichment which prevents the government repaying VAT to companies if it means they would benefit unfairly because it is impossible to pass the recouped VAT back to the people who paid the tax originally. It is the first time Customs has successfully argued unjust enrichment. accountancyage.com See? HMC&E is arguing that M&S would need to be able to reimburse the exact amount of VAT to exactly those people who bought the teacakes when they were subject to VAT! Nonsense? Of course! Solution? You might have your own solution but here are just two from me: either HMC&E or M&S pays the money to a charity: since HMC&E probably can't do that for legal reasons, let M&S do it give the money back to M&S and let them TRANSPARENTLY reduce the selling price of the teacakes they sell now until the money runs out Has HMC&E kept ALL the money? No: The court ruled 90% of the VAT should be retained by the government. accountancyage.com How much money is involved? The BBC provides that answer to that: ... it could be worth £12m to M&S ... Including backdated interest ... M&S believes its claim dates back to 1973 ... The retailer claims it paid £3.3m too much VAT on teacakes £1m too much on bottled water £800,000 on gift vouchers and £500,000 on tinned biscuits news.bbc.co.uk Please note, the BBC article is dated October 2001 so any claims for interest on the amounts owed must be updated to allow for that: another £980,000 at 4% per year compound, possibly. Is this the end of the matter? Not necessarily as M&S could take its case to the House of Lords but it is waiting to learn the outcome over the referral of part of the case to the European court. 'We are considering our position,' said a spokesman. accountancyage.com DW

This just came in and I'm really chuffed about it: Hi D I just wanted to thank you for your VERY informative website. I live in a small town on the South East coast of South Africa called East London (yes, I know, rather British sounding but we used to be a part of the British colonies). I am studying Accounting and Financial Management via correspondence and our local library doesn't have much in the way of Economics or Business. Your website has really helped me with my assignments. Don't worry, I have given you credit in my bibliography! I have done really well so far - all A+ or A's. Nice to know, isn't it. I wrote and thanked Natalie for such kind and unsolicited comments. DW

Update from 27 September. Not only did I paint the front and back door steps but I repainted the front door: looks very smart now, even better than when we moved in. I also painted the garage door: colour = stone. At first Mrs W was horrified and as I was around one third of the way through the first coat she was making plans for an alternative colour. All of our neighbours came to marvel: especially our next door neighbour who realised that he would probably have to paint his own adjacent garage door as his will now look extremely shabby ... it does! After the second coat the following day even Mrs W conceded that the garage door looks smart and the colour is fine. Mr Next Door is unhappy but at the time of writing has still managed to avoid having to paint his own door and the first frost has now struck! He could be safe until next year.

Some of my latest efforts: what I have been up to: Dear DW, Thanks for sending me the answers to the questions concerning IAS1. They have been very helpful to me. have a nice day. Daniel Karin from Italy/Austria continues to get the DW help and assistance treatment. Tony from Liverpool is back and asking about auditing and risk: a huge thanks to Chris Lamb of London Metropolitan University for helping me out with this one. My ImageCorp or PhotoInd spreadsheet is still a popularly requested item: still free of charge! My financial accounting case study is selling well: still only costs £5 and it's a real snip at that. The price WILL be going up soon! My answers to the IAS questions on my site are still popular: still free of charge! Ari used to be confused about capital rationing. Beeny couldn't unravel some basic capital budgeting questions until I came along! And so on! DW

The CBI (Confederation of British Industry) announced that it is furious with the UK government over the UK business tax burden. It says that ... the country's main company taxes stands at around 9% of GDP, above the average of its main trading rivals. . Then the CBI goes on to say The report says the UK is not that different from Germany, where business taxes are 10.1 % of gross domestic product. But worse than the US with 7.3%, with only France taking a significantly higher share of national income, at 14.4%. Well, I reckon the average so far is 10.6% so the UK is doing well. That's an example of how NOT to present an argument: sorry CBI, must try harder! In its defence, The Treasury has criticised the report's calculations and accused the lobby group of being contradictory. Treasury 1 CBI 0 DW

I came across this word in an email just now: who can tell me what gyming means? Seriously, I'd like to know what you think as I present it out of context. Just write to me duncan@duncanwil.co.uk by clicking on this link and then adding your definition! DW

If you're a follower of this glorious WeBlog you might be forgiven for thinking that I've not been updating it ... Blogger.Com and my ISP have been conspiring against me and refused to allow my posts for a while. Here we are again, though: all sorted out ... famous last words! DW

If Hameed from Canada reads this: I tried to reply to your request but my messages were returned as undeliverable ... let me know how to reply successfully and I'll do that. DW

I spent a couple of hours preparing my front lawn for the winter: mowing, raking, mowing and will add the dressing on Wednesday or Thursday. Let me advise you all now that my lawn is the best lawn on our estate and the best that I've seen in our town this summer bar none. The secret has been constant and careful watering and proper feeding and weed control. It's not the best lawn there is since there are about 10 different types of grass in it but it looks a lot better than most and vastly better than some! I close cropped the back lawn too but didn't have the strength to rake and double mow it! By the way the second raking, to get rid of the thatch, produces a shocking amount of materials that would otherwise lie there undiscovered and anyone who is serious about their lawn should do what I did: advice comes courtesy of a wise gardener on BBC Radio Oxford that I tuned into accidentally yesterday around midday. DW

I am spending a bit of time in the Birmingham area at the moment and last week actually spent a night there! My business takes me to the Solihull area but I stayed right in the heart of Birmingham: Broad Street to be precise. I followed detailed directions to get from Solihull to Broad Street but got lost and it took me around an hour and a half to drive the 12 or so miles from door to door. I found my own way back the following morning and took only 45 minutes to accomplish what was a really simple journey by a totally different route. I stopped off in Solihull on Friday morning and relived part of my youth at their market: Eccles cakes, custard tarts, lemon curd ... I had to buy them all. I also invested in some nice Cox's Pippins and Bramley apples, marvellous. Broad Street is a cultural centre: bars, cafes restaurants and hotels abound. I had a decent Indian meal for around £20 in the evening: not especially good value and not the best meal I ever had but decent decor, good service so it wasn't bad. In the morning I needed to go to an internet cafe since I knew someone needed an email response urgently. Hooked up, logged on to the slowest connection since around 1995 in Almaty! I had been there for about 20 minutes when a cheery chappie from BT rocked up and started larging it into his mobile ... switched us all off! I didn't achieve my objectives in full but at least they didn't charge me either! Good business that! DW

Ever heard of Glist? It's a product that you can use in your dishwasher to get your dishes clean ... unless you speak Russian, in which case you think that glist relates to a worm that crawls out of a certain orifice located in the nether regions of your own fair anatomy! You choose!! You might remember that I returned from Ireland last year via Stranraer in Scotland to make sure I could buy some Scottish bread … I have just pulled the second loaf from the freezer and it’s providing more breakfasts of delight! I think it’s survived pretty well and I’ll miss it now as it filled a tidy corner or our small freezer! That’s the last of the Scottish bread in this household but I did notice that Tesco were stocking the self same source of carbohydrates the other week. Trouble is, or it it good news, I’m the only one who likes it chez moi! You'll be fascinated to learn that I painted our front and back doorsteps yesterday: second coats today. An instant hit as it made such a big difference. If only my digital camera weren't at the repair shop again you could have seen the fruits of my labours. DW

Here's a hot tip: if Mike Tomlinson calls and tells you about a guaranteed way to make huge money by investing in Information Biometrics or any other such nonsense, ask him why his company Dunhill Capital is well known as a gang of criminals. He might be able to blether for 5 or 10 minutes about how your money is safe with him. Keep pressing, however, and he'll hang up on you and probably never bother you again! If you are worried about Dunhill Capital, about which I know little, for whom I have never worked and with whom I have never invested ... I can send you a couple of internet links. Alternatively go to www.google.co.uk and do a search for them and see what you find. Don't send them any money under any circumstances is my advice! DW

I wrote this to a Business/Economics discussion list that I'm a member of: Just in case it's slipped everyone's attention, the Enterprise Act that came into force beginning in April of this year contains new powers that Business Studies and Economics teachers and students need to be aware of. The Enterprise Act "works alongside the Competition Act of 1988 and various pieces of consumer legislation, largely replacing the Fair Trade Act 1973": see the PDF file link below for the source of this quotation. This page highlights the major changes to relate to: Mergers Cartels Direct Disqualification Enforcement of Consumer Law Super complaints Market investigation There are also new insolvency rules that this page chooses not to highlight for some reason; and Accountancy Age reports that at least three companies have already fallen foul of the insolvency rules contained within the Enterprise Act even though they only came into force last week: Ciro Cittero, Sentry Box (graphic designers) and MAL Holdings (Mayflower Group). There are several PDF files relating to the various parts of the Act including this general overview. As you might expect, the DTI also has pages devoted to this Act. There is an email alert service available for this Act ... when I tried to sign up, however, I was given an error message so only time will tell whether I was successful! I hope this is of use to everyone. DW

As English English slides into Americanese at an alarming rate, good news. In a report in the Business Today journal there is a small article entitled Communicating: Business bugged by buzzwords. Here are a couple of snippets: 60% of company directors feel annoyed or irritated when people use jargon or buzzwords in business conversation ... buzzwords annoy female directors more than male directors (65% and 57% respectively). The worst offender was 'let's touch base' ... followed by 'no brainer' ... 'synergy' ... 'outside the box' ... 'let's take this offline' ... 'playing hardball'. The author of the original report says that While buzzwords can create an illusion of understanding for those who use them, they often signal just the opposite to others on the receiving end ... Thankfully, good communicators are not born but made, which is good news for those that usually opt for meaningless phrases to paper over the cracks in their knowledge. DW

For disciplinarians here's a great story. I was reading a potted history of a school in the South of England and came across the fact that the headmaster of this school for part of the 18th century was known as Flogging Tom. Thought you might enjoy that! DW

Another helpful visitor pointed out where some of my 404 File Not Found Errors are coming from. Thank you Emma Dicks. Here's what I said to Emma: Thanks Emma, Not only there but in a couple of the linked pages too. Kind of you to take the time to help me out. Best wishes Some good and helpful people on this earth! DW

For only the second time in 16 years I think it was, I managed to be able to watch the Last Night of the Proms on the television last night: this programme marks the end of the Henry Wood Promenade musical concerts that have been held over the summer at the Royal Albert Hall in London for 109 years or so now. It all felt a bit flat I have to say. They had the old favourites in there with our rousing, rattling sing along tunes and songs: Land of Hope and Glory, Rule Britannia and so on; but there was something not quite right. I think it was down to what appeared to be a lack of sponteneity in the audience and some poor camera direction. In the old days the audience at the last night always seemed to be manned (or should that be personed?) by lunatics with a love of music. Now I think that the audience comprises some of those lunatics and some people who are joiners in for the experience and they seem to lack that je ne said quoi that the old timers had. Do you remember that tall chap who always managed to get himself in the middle of the front row and who used to conduct the orchestra and chorus along with the real conductor? He never seemed to be a full shilling to me but he added character. Remember when the singer soloist was a friendly chap or chapess who had some rapport and badinage with the audience or who used to do something wacky during his or her performance? There was no soloist during the mass sing along last night. Do you remember when the conductor used to berate the audience in pantomimic style with something like "Henry can't hear you"! when he felt the sing along element could have been improved on? Leonard Slatkin simply applauded last night's audience after their efforts last night: even though there were the usual encores, there was no real pantomime. There is a new element, too, the Proms in the Park. The Proms in the Park are a good idea in that they set up stages in Hyde Park, Swansea, Belfast and Glasgow and thousands of people flock to them to join in with their own programmes and with the main event in the Albert Hall. All good stuff and there were 40,000 in Hyde park and many thousands of people elsewhere. This is a good and interesting initiative but I think it detracts from the main event. Could be that I've reached an age, a sense of detachment and a level of deafness that militates against my enjoyment of this event now. Either I have to become more intimately involved in the whole process by going to the Last Night or I have to buy a CD of the last night of 1987 or something similar. Ah nostalgia: it's not what it used to be! DW

On my main site I have a 404 (Page not found) message that says something like "If you have arrived at this page, it's because ... please let me know where you were trying to ..." A few visitors have very kindly written to me of late with guidance as to where some of my links problems are: all of a sudden I have been getting HUNDREDS of 404 errors and whilst I've found a lot myself, I obviously haven't found them all. Jennifer wrote this week and helped me to solve one problem. Jim wrote today and helped me to solve several problems. I thanked Jennifer personally of course and this is what I wrote to Jim: Thanks for taking the time to reply, Jim. I had a random look at my home page links and found a batch of problematic ones in the statistics part of the site: I’m very grateful to you for helping me to spot them. On the other hand when I create a new page I tend to copy and paste a link from place to place or use a template: hence, it always comes as a shock when there is such a problem! This is why this problem never comes alone: I must have copied and pasted the home page link in the statistics section three or four times without fully checking. Best wishes and keep reading! Thanks for your help, everyone! DW

Frank runs a web site that shows the history of the UK National Lottery. Frank has lots of interesting tables, charts and analyses on his site and I got involved. I suggested a couple of revisions to his Chi Squared analysis and last I heard he was working on my ideas. Let me point out that Frank's site is unofficial and at the end of his home page you will read this disclaimer: These pages are not in any way associated with the Camelot Group plc. The draw results on which the presented information is based has been checked thoroughly but can not be treated as an official source. Analysis methods are subject to my personal interpretation and shared with you for interest only. Past lottery results cannot predict future results and this site is intended to indicate trends only. Because this site is operated by an individual there may be occasions when information has not been updated to include the latest draw. Furthermore, I will not be held accountable for any winnings or loss of winnings or monies spent through the use of the information provided. Sensible disclaimer, Frank! DW

Cabell wrote, too, with an interesting spreadsheeting/statistical question that I am in the middle of exploring. Cabell offered me a solution to a problem and I offered her a revised solution. We're talking! This could become a page, too! DW

Looks like I've made another friend in a far flung place! Jaunita wrote again with another few questions on statistics and definitions. I worked through them line by line and turned my answers into a new page on my web site. Well worth a look! DW

Back to Yorkshire! I drove up on Friday afternoon and took it easy, enjoying the facility of cruise control. It's a breeze to take your foot off the accelerator and be able to stretch one's legs and so forth. Being so tall is a problem for me and I normally get a jippy hip on long drives. So cruise control gets rid of that then. Brother Angus has a Beemer too but he never uses his cruise control as (a) he's an erratic driver I think so (b) he never gets into a position for his speed to settle and (c) he's not that tall. Anyway arrived, had a bite to eat and then off to one of Halifax's finest hostelries wherein libations ensued and blether, swearing and gay badinage were all the rage. Back for a nightcap, more blether and then some fitful sleep as the pay back was that I caught a case of the hiccups at some unearthly hour. Woke up to a slightly thick head for some reason and feeling a bit the worse for wear. Not understandable as we didn't drink that much. Age at the root of it all, perhaps? Went for a walk round Halifax with Neville the brother in law as sister Susan went to the hairdresser's. It lashed it down as we toured the Piece Hall so we had to invest in an umbrella apiece: cost me all of £1.99 for the pleasure! Then it stopped raining and became sunny. Still, one needs about five umbrellas doesn't one? Took a walk round Ogden Water, a couple of miles out of Halifax and that's a nice place as you can see from the photographs I uploaded realier. Time pressures meant we couldn't ramble for very long but I'd liked to have. I recommend a walk there if you're ever in the area: lots of birds, trees, tranquility and the vista is more than acceptable. Tootled off to Hebden Bridge to collect son Daniel and his partner Max. Another hostelry experience ensued but as I was driving I stuck to lemonade whilst they all drank dirty beer and wine! Susan rustled up a more than adequate lasagne for supper and once we had been joined by sister Fiona and hubby Danny we went to yet another hostelry where I enjoyed only a small amount of beer due to the hangover from last night. A good loud blethering session followed as we braved a large bar in the centre of Halifax where at one stage I was afraid of being the "oldest swinger in town" but there were older!! The sight of the night was that of two young ladies squatting in doorways opposite with knickers round their knees as they partook of a micturition session ... all over the place ... in public, in full view of at least a dozen people: have they no shame? Still a good time was had by all and a little bit of red wine helped the land of Nod to beckon readily. Up and about in time to do the Tod Rag's cryptic crossword and finished it all but for one and a half clues: Susan and Neville provided the answers to those. Left Halifax at just after 1 pm and got home three hours later, allowing for a short stop half way back. I have a sneaking suspicion that I might have been caught speeding by one of those wretched cameras that they have on all our roads these days. Only one or two mph in it, mind ... I'm waiting for the postman to announce the verdict in a few days' time. Here endeth the weekend's report. DW

Jaunita wrote, I think from Namibia with this question, that elicited that answer! Could you please give and explain to m the arithmetic formula to work out Mean, Mode and Median. I'm study at the moment but can't understand the formula. Thanks Jaunita Hello Jaunita, The arithmetic formula for each of the mean, the median and the mode are fairly simple and with a bit of practice they will be easy for you. The mean is the same as the arithmetic mean and is what we normally use when we calculate an average figure add together all the numbers you have and divide them by the total number of numbers For example, find the arithmetic mean of 6,9,2,6,3,8,9,2,4,6: 6+9+2+6+3+8+9+2+4+6 ÷ 10 (because there are 10 numbers altogether) = 55 ÷ 10 = 5.5 The mode is the number in a set of numbers that occurs most often: that is, in a set of numbers we might find that some numbers occur more than once and the mode is the one that there are most of. For example, from the list we just saw 6,9,2,6,3,8,9,2,4,6 the frequencies of each number are 2 = 2 3 = 1 4 = 1 6 = 3 8 = 1 9 = 2 Since there are more of number 6 than any other number, the mode is number 6 The median is the middle value in a set, or list, of values. To find the median we need to put the list in order and then find the number in the middle. For example, using the list we have already used, we find: 2 2 3 4 6 6 6 8 9 9 It’s best when there is an odd number of numbers as we can see here when we have 10 numbers and really there is no number in the middle. What we do now is to take the numbers on either side of the middle, add them together and divide them by 2 … easy in this case: (6 + 6)/2 = 6 So the median number is 6. I hope that’s clear Juanita. Try finding the mean, median and mode from these lists, Juanita and confirm the answers I have given below. 6 8 5 4 8 8 3 7 7 6 mean 6.2 median 6.5 mode 8 And again: 9 6 12 9 6 7 6 12 17 20 17 mean 11 median 9 mode 6 Where in the world are you Jaunita? Just interested. DW

Another trip back up to Yorkshire over the weekend. The car behaved itself very well and a good time was had by all even though it got a bit nippy at night. I went to a place called Ogden Water with sister Susan and her husband Neville: here are a couple of snaps thereof. Notice how low the water is: hosepipe bans next year unless I'm much mistaken! There'll be more about that trip before long. DW