Free Entertainment Needed? Sit near the hat rack

Want some free but rich entertainment? Then sit yourself near the novelty hat rack in a Christmas market. You will have endless fun as old and young, male and female, couples and singles try them on.

The best sport is to be had by those who insist on having their photos taken in the hats. The more ridiculous hat the more they like it. V signs, forced smiles and endless patience all displayed.

Another mega top tip!!

DW
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... as others see us

Of course, the UK is seen around the world in any light you care to name, from fantastic to an utter waste of space.

Just watching the news on Channel NewsAsia and there were two reports on the UK:

• crapwrap
• cheese rolling

Crapwrap

In London you can pay to have someone wrap your Christmas presents so badly that your recipients will be convinced that you must have done it yourself. Apparently, as many people at one shop opted for this service as opted to have their gifts wrapped properly

Cheese Rolling

They showed several adventurous men (didn't see any women) hurtling down a very steep hill in Leicestershire (? sorry, but didn't catch the name of the village) after ... a cheese. It's a 30 year old tradition in which someone throws a round cheese so that it rolls at speed down the hill and the competitors have to chase and catch it. Good news? Not so many people had to go to hospital this time: only 19 this year, including the winner!

Madness but it's better than all that serious stuff we see in which politicians and the like illustrate how far and how quickly they are falling down and out of their stupid trees.

DW

Taxi Sir?

This happened in the street as I wandered back to the hotel:

Driver: Taxi sir?

Me: No thank you.

Driver: (without hesitation of so much as a nanosecond) Do you want a nice lady?

Me: (Sorry but I burst out laughing!!)


DW



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Is it a Barrage Balloon or just a Balloon?

It's shocking and I'm going to be sizist and sexist now.

Sitting in the departure lounge at Doha Airport, Qatar and there are many nicely slim Asian and Middle Eastern women walking around.

Then there are many, many British woman the size of barrage balloons wobbling around. What are they thinking?

• They are not healthy
• They are not attractive
• They are not cool

They are usually badly dressed too.

Then there is about one in three of these women sporting a tattoo. egads, it just gets worse.

At least they don't have the opportunity to go on a binge drinking episode while they are here do they?

This is another official rant!

DW

Pony Tails on Men

Well, hardly men are they!

I feel wretched every time I see a man sporting a pony tail. Especially sad, old and middle aged men who have either missed some boat or other or who think they are being dreamily cool.

My theory is that these pony tails pull the hair so tight against the head that it looks from the front as if the wearer has a short back and sides hair cut ... which is the hair style they REALLY want but are too stupid to admit.

That's an official rant.

DW

Are you sure?

Just read this on a news wire:

... say they have unearthed vials of perfume similar to those that may have been used by ...

Well, were they or weren't there, did she or didn't she?

DW

Long Legs: top travel tip

If you are tall and go somewhere where the population is much shorter, on average, be sure to take care when sitting down to eat in a restaurant. You WILL crack your knees if you don't.

You don't get top tips like that on those "Wow look where I am and you're not" travel programmes.

DW
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