17.8.11

Ironing: the laws

Here are some laws of ironing that I know everyone knows but maybe they haven’t been shared until now:

1 The crease that you accidentally iron in the wrong place will never come out

a) until the next time the garment is washed if it is a minor item of clothing
b) if the garment and the place on the garment where the crease is made is of strategic significance

2 The crease that you deliberately iron into a sleeve or a trouser leg is volatile and can be removed in a simple hiss of steam and will drop out almost immediately the garment is worn

3 The amount of water needed to complete your ironing with a standard (ie not travelling) steam iron is governed by the irritability law of ironing

wn = 0.25l + 1.35KgC

where:
wn = water needed
l = litre
KgC = litres per kilogrammes of clothes to be ironed

4 The temperature setting on an iron can be left at for all things worn by males

5 The temperature setting on an iron is infinitely variable for all things worn by females

6 The corollary of rule 5 is that no male can ever understand and effectively apply rule 5

7 The amount of training required to iron clothes properly is in inverse proportion to the amount of training actually received.

I am sure there are many more of these laws and would love to hear them!

DW