I might be Interested but it has to be a two way Street!

I came home from holiday phase one today and as we were sitting on the tarmac at Schipol Airport, the man next to me asked me, "Where are you coming from then?" I told him and he then announced that he was returning home from Indonesia where his son has been teaching English as a foreign language for a year.

Normally, I sit on aeroplanes and keep myself to myself. Sometimes I have sat next to old people, especially, who seem to be a bit befuddled and I might talk to them. If someone talks to me, I will reply.

So, this chap told me about his trip, he listened politely to some of what I said in return but once he was satisfied that I knew about his son and their trip to Indonesia, he got his book out and started reading!

That's FYI, people!

DW

Red Bean and Vegetable Stew

Every now and then I come across or even create some excellent food: this dish is one of those moments. Try it, adapt it as you wish and then enjoy it … no meat, no fuss, very little cost!

Ingredients

• 1 medium sized onion, halved then sliced
• two medium sized carrots, sliced
• 2 cloves of garlic, finely chopped
• 6 - 8 button mushrooms, sliced or chopped or left whole
• can of chopped tomatoes (optional)
• two medium sized potatoes, each cut into 8 - 10 pieces
• can of red kidney beans
• tomato paste/puree
• seasoning
• oil for frying

Method

heat the oil to medium heat and throw in the garlic: allow them to cook for a few seconds to release their flavour and then add the onions and carrots. let these cook until the onions are soft and see through

add mushrooms and potatoes, stir and cook for a further few minutes, to heat the potatoes through a little

add two heaped teaspoons of tomato paste and the entire can of beans, juices included

then quickly add the entire can of chopped tomatoes with additional boiling water if needed OR boiling water, to cover all of the ingredients then bring the pan to the boil*

put a lid on your pan/pot now and reduce the temperature to low to cook the stew on simmer for as long as it takes to cook the potatoes at which point the stew is ready

season to taste

*at this stage and as an alternative, you could put the stew in the oven on medium heat to cook the potatoes if you wish and that will enhance the flavour but extend the cooking time

This stew takes 15 minutes or so to prepare and about the same to cook, on the hob, longer in the oven. The stew is a meal in itself and will serve 2 - 4 people depending on which meal of the day and appetites. Crusty buttered bread goes well with it!

DW

Cricket: the definition

Me (as the news of England's mammoth victory over India and elevation back to world's number one status came in): Do you know anything about cricket?

Friend (female, not British): There's a team, a big stick and a ball. That's it!

Me: I see.

Isn't that the simplest definition of cricket you have ever seen?

DW

How to Make Chips ... PROPERLY

I watched a few episodes of a cookery programme by a chef turned cookery writer the other week. This man made appealing food and seemed to be a good and confident cook. He is NOT one of these artificial, ne'er do well, cooks from Yorkshire who says everything's lovely and it's his granny's recipe!!

However, Simon ... he's from Bury and called Simon can you believe ... extolled the virtues of double fried chips. My response to that? Tosh, utter tosh! Jack Locke would be turning in his grave if ever he heard that people said the perfect chip is the double fried chip.

Here is the ONLY way to make perfect chips, with or without a chip pan or deep fat fryer. Prepare the chips in the way you prefer (thin, thick, peeled or unpeeled ...) and bring your chosen fat to the correct temperature. Bring the fat back to the correct temperature as it WILL have cooled as the chips have been added. NOW, immediately reduce the temperature to low and cook the chips until they become soft, i.e. cooked. THEN turn the temperature high again and the fat will bubble with joy. Cook now until the chips are as brown and crisp as YOU like them. Bear in mind that the chips will turn brown very quickly so be careful not to overcook them.

THIS will give you perfect chips!

That's not to say that double fried chips aren't any good, maybe they are; but my method, culled from standing in the queue in Locke's chip shop as a child and watching how Jack made the perfect chip shop chip, is the ONLY way. I would guess that no chip shop worth its salt ever double fries its chips! Well, maybe that nancy cook from Yorkshire's granny did!

DW

Ironing: the laws

Here are some laws of ironing that I know everyone knows but maybe they haven’t been shared until now:

1 The crease that you accidentally iron in the wrong place will never come out

a) until the next time the garment is washed if it is a minor item of clothing
b) if the garment and the place on the garment where the crease is made is of strategic significance

2 The crease that you deliberately iron into a sleeve or a trouser leg is volatile and can be removed in a simple hiss of steam and will drop out almost immediately the garment is worn

3 The amount of water needed to complete your ironing with a standard (ie not travelling) steam iron is governed by the irritability law of ironing

wn = 0.25l + 1.35KgC

where:
wn = water needed
l = litre
KgC = litres per kilogrammes of clothes to be ironed

4 The temperature setting on an iron can be left at … for all things worn by males

5 The temperature setting on an iron is infinitely variable for all things worn by females

6 The corollary of rule 5 is that no male can ever understand and effectively apply rule 5

7 The amount of training required to iron clothes properly is in inverse proportion to the amount of training actually received.

I am sure there are many more of these laws and would love to hear them!

DW

Submerged … and under water too!

I heard this on the radio this morning:

they … submerged speakers … actually under the water

Midge Ure
Radio 4 at 11:31 am
11th August 2011
The Art of Water Music

DW

Too old to complain?

I need to write about this and send it to the BBC but if I did they would reply and tell me that I am too old and that they are aiming at a younger audience.

Fine!

Anyway, I just watched a “comedy” programme from the BBC on my laptop and the compere introduced each “act” by saying, “Give it up for X …” I know and you know that no one knows what on earth it means to give it up for someone or something. So,

Dear BBC … let’s have people speaking English on the BBC please.

In fact, I think I’ll start an ePetititon for that.

DW

If you enjoy a rant … have a ruddy good go!

I seem to remember that Gordon Brown got involved in this big society idea; and of course fell foul of it.

They’ve done it again and it’s a winner in my opinion. Take yourself along to this web site: http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk and click on view all petitions then start reading.

As I am reading down the list, sad to say that many of the petitions have earned just one vote. You start a debate on a matter of importance to you and you vote for it. You then wait for 99,999++ other people to agree with you at which point your idea MIGHT attract some parliamentary interest.

Of course I am reading them to see what kind of rants are getting through. Here’s an entertaining one entitled Reduce number of anti social 4x4s, started by Alex Gordon and you’ve only got until 7th August 2012 to vote for it or it will die, presumably. I won’t do any canvassing on the 4x4 rant but Gordon has a three point plan to do with 4x4s. For example, “3. Permit local councils to dictate all 4x4s registered in their area to be painted vibrant colours (eg bright pink) with slogans (eg I can’t help being selfish, sorry) and to ban very dark windows.”

Now’s your chance to get involved.

DW

Gone for a Walk!

After having spent so much time locked away in a guest house in Afghanistan, it is vital that I get my body as fit as possible again. Since some clown stole my car a few years ago I have been carless: that helps to get the pins moving as I have to walk everywhere.

So, on Friday, I trusted the weather forecast and set off from home to walk to Ogden Water in Halifax. The weather was pretty good but even though it's early August, I did the right thing to wear a pullover and shirt as well as taking a coat with me.

I  made a mistake by not checking my camera battery the night before: I had charged the battery over the weekend so was completely surprised to find the battery totally drained as I tried to take my first photo!

After that, I had an ordnance survey map with me and referred to it frequently: good practice and good safety I'd say. As a second safety device, I checked that my phone was working from time to time ... and it wasn't always working! There are black spots in phone coverage. However, the only black spot I found was at Ogden Water itself; and there were other people there!! So no damage done.

I spent a total of four hours on the hoof altogether and was absolutely warn out by the time I got home at 3 pm.

I had a long hot shower as soon as I got in as I was dripping in sweat: really, my shirt and pullover were drenched! I lay on the bed after the shower and fell asleep. A good day but there are so many hills and the terrain can be rough that the work was hard!

I was dreading Saturday but my legs had stood up well (pun intended!) and I walked to the supermarket and back and while I am no longer a whippet like young chap, it went well.

Today, Sunday, I can walk up and down stairs without dragging myself with the aid of the bannister!

I want to take another walk today but it is persistently tipping it down!

Remember, I couldn't use my good camera but my phone camera did quite well ...

You'll find many more photos and a video on my Facebook page ... why not hurtle over there now?
DW

So that's where it went ...

When you are completely flummoxed as to where you put that blender, don't forget to look at that box on the balcony outside the kitchen: the balcony that's open to the elements, wind, rain, hail, snow ...

That's a top tip.

DW

Witchcraft or is it that Steve Jobs knows what he’s doing?

So I bought a MacBook Pro and all is well. I have yet to learn all of its ins and outs but it starts quickly, comes out of hibernation quickly, opens software quickly. Macs update software in a tidy and orderly manner …

Following on from my Windows mayhem of the other day, I bought, downloaded and installed OS Lion for the Mac last night and it worked. The file is a monstrous 3.5 Gb but i let it download and once it had, it took 40 minutes or so to install and reboot … ready for action.

The promised features are installed and they work. Instantly available la la la.

Some of the features, such as moving between pages and files and software by sliding … truly beautiful!

We used to have the blue screen of death with Windows. Windows XP seemed to get rid of it. I am getting more and more and more blue wheels of death now with Vista and Windows 7. Blue wheel and Not Responding messages. Tired of them.

So far Jobs 10 v Gates 0

DW

You think I’d Learn!

Following on from my previous post, I volunteered for the self inflicted wound of accepting an invitation to install Internet Explorer 9. Why did I think that would be any good?

I started using it and found that I was chopped off from Facebook every two or three minutes. I thought, hmm, poor connection.

After a gap of a couple of hours, I logged on again to Facebook and was cast out yet again so I put two and two together and closed IE9 probably never to open it again. I can’t remember the details but I had a similar experience when IE8 was now and I rarely used that too.

We now know that there’s only one way that Bill Gates III got to be so wealthy don’t we?

DW

Gatesed AGAIN!

My limp wristed HP laptop has been in storage since April but had to be dragged into service this week. I have spent the week in Saudi Arabia, back on the road; and needed to use and demonstrate Excel 2007 … installed on the HP laptop.

Here’s the truth: when one leaves a laptop in storage for four months, there are many, many, many updates to download once the thing is revived. This week I have been caught out to the nth degree. Monday was bad but today was the worst.

On Monday I downloaded and installed some Windows nonsense and the thing ran slower than a very slow thing … spreadsheets had their buttons all grey … I overcame all of that. Then Wednesday, today: i knew last night that I had downloaded and started to install some more Windows nonsense last night. This morning, I started the computer at 5:45 am … yes FIVE 45 am: I had things to do. An hour and a half later, having not been able to do any work, I thought my worries were over. Remember, I had things to do … I hadn’t been able to do them.

Because I wasn’t able to do my work, I was caught short initially but being cool and suave I overcame all obstacles.

The moral of this story: buy a Mac!

DW

Torchwood and Top Gear

Torchwood … now what is that all about?

I get the impression it’s a very popular programme on British television. I have seen one episode on BBC World and some trailers and documentaries telling us how the special effects work. In my opinion it’s probably only second to Top Gear in its crassness.

Tell me you disagree but it’s pretty amateur to me.

Top Gear! Today I happened to see that long haired girl flying a barrage balloon with a caravan strapped to it. It was flying out of control and when it floated across Norwich Airport’s live runways and air space I felt the time had come to close that stupid programme. As the girly presenter was imploring them not to scramble the police helicopter, he crashed into a wood and the shame of it is that he wasn’t even hurt a little bit.

Call it nonsense entertainment with cars and a girly presenter, a small unfunny man and Jeremy “Jemima Puddleduck” Clarkson the utterly untalented and that’s fine. To pretend that Top Gear is anything else is an insult.

DW

Air Con: give it a swerve

Following that bad touch of bronchitis I had at the start of this year, brought on by thinking having a room heater on 24 hours a day was a good idea, I said to myself … never again.

It’s hot here now so I put the air conditioning unit on for just five or so minutes a time three or four times a day. Guess what? I’ve got the sniffles!

First time I switched it on, a load of fine dust came flying out. Since then, no dust and I really have had the thing on for no more than five minutes or so.

These things are so unhealthy and should be avoided at all costs. However, I am fighting the sniffles.

DW

Moscow Snippets

The trouble with Facebook is that it is keeping me away from here. I am posting photos there and bits of what I am up to. The photos: well, I wouldn’t post so many here anyway.

I recently spent a fantastic week in Moscow and have uploaded a lot of photos to Facebook. Here are just a few with a tiny commentary.

Firstly, my favourite painting from the Tretyakovsky Gallery

This is a portrait of VA Perovsky and I love his individuality. If you go to the gallery, just compare this portrait with the portraits of just about everyone else there!

Also from the Tretyakovsky Gallery but I was tired by this time so I took long range photos as I sat on a bench and zoomed in using the camera. Lazy way but smart and not an especially important painting!

Statue of Peter I: this is a MUST SEE statue. The Soviets and now the Russians have a monopoly on the world’s best statues, on average. Here’s one of their newest, on a bend in the Moscow River. It’s huge but I love it although most Muscovites don’t, apparently:

From the Polytechnicheski Museum … Felix the Cat?

Anyone know what this is? Answers on a postcard.

Metro sign:

From Moscow Zoo: my favourite bird photo

Another major statute, also at Moscow Zoo: Pushkin’s tales or something!

Well, there you are … some of what I did and where I went in Moscow. Fabulous weather, by the way, all week!

DW

Fran for London 2012

Time to help to publicise Fran.

Daughter Fran is well on the road to the London Paralympics in 2012, next year.

The Olympics organising committee has just announced that they are looking for 8,000 Olympic torch bearers and Fran has let it be known that she’d like to be one of them! I agree. So, take a look at this:

http://www.fran-williamson.co.uk/latest-news.html

Where you will find a lot of information about Fran and the link to nominate her as torch bearer. It doesn’t say so and in case you don’t know, Fran lives in Cambridgeshire … it’s a question on the nomination form!

Take a look at this, too: http://www.anglia.ac.uk/ruskin/en/home/news/countdown_to_2012_paralympics.html

Fran’s new publicist Chris is doing a good job for her!

DW

You know you’ve a good idea when …

… someone steals it and claims it as their own.

It happens now and again and happened yesterday.

I am strong!

DW

Beatification of Someone

Please stop this nonsense. Someone is going through the process of beatification in Rome. The miracle that is supposed to have started this is far from confirmed: what is worse is that the supposed miracle comes from a Nun … someone whose psychology is probably already suspect in terms of something like this.

Still, they have done it now and the world will shortly see its first celebrity Saint, thus opening the door to the ghastly spectre of future Vatican TV showing programmes such as

• Big Saint
• Come Sainting
• SingalongaSaint
• The Saint Factor

All future Popes can probably expect to be elevated from now on.

Mugabe was invited and went to the ceremony too and that can’t be right can it?

The is perfect Church politics and nothing less. It has nothing to do with reality let alone spirituality.

DW

It’s Official: it’s amazing!

It’s official: the wedding yesterday was amazing … the Queen said so as she arrived back at Buckingham Palace.

Let it be said that I have not watched a Royal Wedding since I have no idea when! Charles, no; Anne, never; Andrew, as if; Edward, pshaw … any others?

On behalf of a friend in a country far away who was trapped in an office without access to a television, I turned official wedding photographer. OK so snaps using a 3Mp camera in a BlackBerry Bold is hardly the stuff of photographic heaven. However, I provided a running commentary on colours of outfits and then the first official photos of the bride’s dress. Within a minute or so, my photo had gone around the world and people in that office were delighted.

The IMOM strikes again! Glad to be of service ma’am!

As to the wedding: imagine being the woman, much more than the man, who has such a superb choice of venue, order of service, dress, reception, palace, soldiers. For Britain, this is a magnificent contribution to the marketing of the country. No one on the planet who loves a parade and some ceremony can deny that yesterday’s spectacle was magnificent.

Hundreds of millions of Pounds will pour into Britain as a direct result of this ceremony: it wasn’t even a State event!

As for the drivel spoken by so called commentators and people in the crowds … they’re such nice people, he’s really down to earth … tripe. All tripe and really uncalled for. The Royal Family is among the world’s most privileged group of people: not just for inherited wealth but for access and isolation. They can really go where and do what they want, when they want and hang the consequences. Just look at the behaviour of the Duke of York: lambasted for his behaviour in his roving business ambassador role.

Then the people highlighted by the BBC as they entered the Abbey. The Beckhams and Elton John: the zenith of British society? I think not! And that Tara Palmer Blah Ma … hardly the epitome of role models for young girls.

Overall, a fabulous day out for Britain shared by the world and it’s something we do well in the UK. Would I sack the palaces today and disband the royalty, though? Yes!

I chatted to people throughout the day from half a dozen countries around the world and they ALL watched the wedding and loved it: or they looked in awe at my photographs and my mini commentary and loved it.

Crack on with normal life now!

DW