London Trip

I am back at home after a successful two day trip to London. This morning in particular was sunny and ideal for photography.

I took almost 100 photos and will post one or two here.

The train to and from London was much better than the last time I went. Quicker, cleaner and more modern. Not cheap though.

More tomorrow.

DW
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Thank you The Royal Mail

I got a Christmas card from the Royal Mail yesterday. Thank you RM, much appreciated. However, I don't understand it! On the front of the card it says:

We're all about this Christmas

On the one hand it's understandable but on the other it's like that phrase that the 12 year olds at the BBC use, "Here are some stories to keep you across"

Humbug!

DW
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I just love this graphic

There is a serious message behind the graphic I am sending you to here, courtesy of The Economist; but I think it is such a suave chart. I dream of being able to produce graphics like this!

http://media.economist.com/images/na/2008w47/co2.jpg

DW

Blog of the Year

Hooray! You will probably not be in the least bit surprised to hear that Duncan’s Diurnal Diatribe has been voted BLOG OF THE YEAR 2008.

I’d like to thank …

Yours in humility

DW

Nigerian Scam

You will guffaw at this, I know I did!

Talking to a couple colleagues the other day and for some reason we talked about Nigerian scams: Dear Blah, my father died and has left me $12,500,000.00 (don’t you just love the 0.00 at the end?) … give me all of your bank account details and I will transfer that money to you … you keep scads and I take the rest …

Well, here’s one that apparently has seriously caught out a few people:

Loveletter Odwomu is proudly serving Nigeria on board the International Space Station. He has been there for three weeks and has carried out many valuable experiments for Nigeria and mankind. Now, however, Loveletter’s got a problem: he needs $2,500,000.00 to get home. Loveletter paid for his fare to get him to the Station but his investments have been hit by the world wide banking crisis … please send all you can to …

DW

Tut, tut, tut The Economist

I have just read in a recent edition of The Economist that David Cameron is “likely to be the next Prime Minister” [of the UK]. Oh really?

Then, whilst talking about Tory Toffs like Cameron and George Osborne, they say that there are non Toffs high up in the ranks of the Parliamentary Tory Party. They named William Hague and Michael Gove. Is that good?

Since Hague and Gove are on my hit list of men most in need of political castration, I found myself gasping that The Economist could publish such things.

DW

Prostitution: the Home Secretary fell further down the stupid tree

The UK Government wants to protect women in prostitution who are being trafficked and controlled. That is, those poor women who are under the influence of someone odious who is taking their money, their passport perhaps …

I agree people (ie not only women) who are working as prostitutes should be able to do so under their own terms and conditions, free from financial and other control. I do NOT believe for a moment that all prostitutes are down trodden women who are desperate and under the control of a man and only a man.

So far so good: if the government can eliminate such awful nonsense then I will be as happy as anyone.

What the Home Secretary has done is to bring forward a proposal that anyone who uses the services of a prostitute who is working under the control and duress of another is guilty of a crime. Does the Home Secretary not realise the Chief Wiggins moments that are going to ensue? Imagine this:

Lady: Good evening, sir, do you want business?

Man: Yes, how much?

Lady: £50 in your car and £60 in my flat.

Man: OK, in the car. Oh!, by the way are you under the control and duress of a prostitute Baron aka a pimp or are you working of your own free will?

Lady: (Shifting nervously from foot to foot and looking furtively up and down the street) No, no, no; I am doing this because I want to, the kids need feeding ...

Man: Are you sure?

Lady: Yes, honestly, love. C’mon, let’s go. (She gets into the car as a man watching from afar with binoculars and listening with a long range directional microphone smiles contentedly to himself.)

Man: OK, good. (Drives off)

One more clunk from a hefty branch there, then, Home Secretary.

DW

Passion is the new Amazing

I have got heartily sick of how amazing things are these days. However, the word passion is now being even more widely over used.

Every now and again I like to watch cookery programmes; but I am wary now because I find the number people who are passionate about cheese, meat, frying ... is, well, amazing.

The same with anything to do with football. The amount of passion in football is astonishing.

How about a bit of variety? Let's think of new words for amazing and passion.

Amazing: _________

Passion: _________


DW
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Rachmaninov's Vespers

A long time ago I went to a performance of Rachmaninov's Vespers in King's College Chapel, Cambridge. It was a magnificent evening. Glorious music and song in a perfect setting. Three encores I think.

I bought a CD of the Vespers a little while later and it is a marvellous thing.

Now, I have transferred Vespers to my iPod and it is heavenly to listen to. I especially like Blazhen Muzh and Bogoroditsye Devo

DW
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Using ‘power curves’ to assess industry dynamics

This just came in via my inbox from The McKinsey Quarterly:

Plotting the structure of industries across markets and geographies reveals a startling and increasing inequality in size and performance among even the largest companies.
What emerges is a “power curve” pattern characterized by a short “head,” comprising a few companies with extremely large incomes and quickly dropping off to a long “tail” of significantly smaller competitors.
These power curves can be a useful diagnostic tool for understanding the structural dynamics of an industry and a company’s role and options in its evolution.

Now, I am the first to admit that I am not McKinsey calibre but I am way ahead of this one as I have been analysing and presenting such curves for years.

DW

They’re Dead

I have just read the ghastly news in the FT (http://www.ft.com/cms/s/1/28face8a-b22e-11dd-bbc9-0000779fd18c.html) that you can have someone’s ashes turned into an artificial diamond once they have been cremated.

What on earth will they think of next?

DW

Condensation

The condensation on the windows in Kuala Lumpur forms on the outside of the windows, not indoors. The same on cars, too

How about that?

DW
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Credit Card Companies

I warned people about the problems that would follow if the credit card companies started to suffer.

Well, some CC companies are converting to banks to get access to certain forms of finance.

I keep warning you!

DW
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Snotus!

In the Low Yat Centre in Kuala Lumpur last night in a veggie restaurant when I spotted a packet of flowery/herbal tea. It was the name, however, that really caught my eye so I couldn’t resist taking its photo:

You might be able to work out that the name SNOTUS seems to come from one of its ingredients: SNOw loTUS … it could be fine in Malay and Chinese but …

 

DW

Jack … is it amazing?

I just read that the name Jack has been the top boy’s name for babies born in the UK for all of the last 13 years to the end of 2007. I find that interesting.

I read that fact in a booklet from the Office of National Statistics (ONS) where they say it is “amazing” that Jack has been number one for so long. Do YOU think it’s amazing? Are you really amazed by that?

I know some of you think I am barking mad in this respect but I wrote to the ONS asking them why they thought it was so amazing. If they reply I’ll let you know what they say!

DW

Japan Goes Bananas

Did you know that Japan is suffering from a banana crisis, according to Time magazine. Read on, then:

Japanese consumers eager to try the latest fad diet to sweep the country, the Morning Banana Diet, are finding it difficult to buy the fruit that gives the diet its name. Invented by a pharmacist to help her husband, Hitoshi, to lose weight, the Morning Banana Diet took off when he discussed his weight loss of 37 pounds on www.mixi.jp, a Japanese social networking site. When a TV show profiled an opera singer who lost 15 pounds in 6 weeks on the diet, a banana shortage was born.
Life Corporation, which runs 201supermarkets throughout Japan, has seen a 70% - 80% increase in weekly sales and Dole Japan, a leading importer, has boosted imports by 25%; and still can't keep up with demand. Books about the diet have so far sold about 730,000 copies.

Source:
"Japan Goes Bananas for a New Diet," Time magazine, October 17, 2008.

Odd that!

DW

iPod Inconsistencies or is it the BBC?

Now you know I don’t like to moan but even the iPod touch seems to have Microsoft like inconsistencies. I’ve told you the story of how I can’t download some software because I am away from home.

Well, today I downloaded a podcast from the good old BBC of the Chelsea v Sunderland goals. I clicked on play and the posh chappie from the BBC pronounced that for copyright reasons I wasn’t allowed to see the goals.

SO WHY DID YOU LET ME DOWNLOAD THE FRICKING THING THEN?

Who are these wasters?

DW

iPod Woes

I can’t half pick ‘em.

You know I just bought an iPod touch. I have transferred loads of music and photos etc onto it. It’s a good thing.

It tells me to update the software so I try. It tells me it cannot reach the server. Over and over again.

I write to Apple for help. They reply, I do what they say and it doesn’t work. I write back and they ignore me. I write again and TWO people reply: different solutions.

New solution one also fails.

Solution two tells me not to bother trying to update anything because the system knows that I am travelling away from home. It doesn’t like me travelling away from home. It throws a hissy fit and stops my downloads.

I write and thank them both: properly, of course, as they are only doing their jobs.

I add, though,that iPods are built to allow us to enjoy music and films etc on the move so they shouldn’t be surprised when we move around with our iPods and stuff!

In 12 day’s time I will get back home and see what might happen then!

DW

An Impressive Advertising Budget

This is all I will say about the US Presidential election result.

Give me

• two years
• $1,600,000,000 to spend on advertising/campaigning

and I will become President of the USA.

You have to be desperate and excessively wasteful to spend that amount of money just to pass a job interview.

Don’t forget, also, that McCain only spent $924,000,000 on himself.

DW

Gusset Trauma and Manchester University's Toilets

Gusset Trauma

How about this? I have just been told that there is a sign at the top of the Jumeirah Sheikher water slide at Wild Wadi in Dubai that says this:

"Keep legs crossed to prevent gusset trauma."

Doesn't bear thinking about does it?

Manchester University's Toilets

I have come late to this story I think but I was told this evening that the signs on ALL Manky Uni's toilets were changed to say

• Either non urinal toilet (women)
• Or urinal toilet (men)

This cost the Uni GBP70,000.

Who are these people who wasted this money? Which managers allowed themselves to get involved in such a stupid, peurile discussion?

DW

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