Phones ... Hardly

I am in Dubai Airport duty free and have just noticed the Vertu range of mobile phones. They're labelled exclusive. They're tagged as phones for the discriminating chap.

There's phones with gold. There's phones made from titanium, in an 800 ton press of course.

You can pay 112,000 Dirhams or so for the gold phone and as little as 24,000 Dirhams for the titanium version. A snip in my opinion.

Just in case you haven't traded in Dirhams for a while, a rough guide is to divide them by 7 and you will get Pounds Sterling. So, that's about £16,000 for the gold phone and just £3,428 for the more ordinary titanium phone.

There are cheaper phones than the titanium phone but one wouldn't would one.

The most interesting aspect of the sales pitch is the complete lack of reference to its functionality as a phone. They have incorporated the letter V into the shape of the screen so that's a bit of a downer for a start. Rather vulgar to think about this end of things though isn't it?

And here's me jipping at the thought of paying £200 or so for a BlackBerry. Pshaw!

DW
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More on the UN

I found out today what the multi million Pound car park at the hote was all about. The hotel was home to, get ready for this, a UN SENIOR MANAGEMENT RETREAT. Poor wee lambs: can you imagine the stress they must be under?

These people can't even respect the country they have retreated into. This country is really called THE Sudan. On the presentation slide that I managed to take a look at these clowns had called it just Sudan. You know, some people are deeply offended by such ineptitude.

DW
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Feel part of the Community

I went back to the Afra Mall today to change some money. I went into the exchange place and started doing the deal. I was given a scrap of paper and a pen that almost worked. I needed to divulge my name, address in Khartoum and telephone number.

Almost as soon as I started my deal I was joined by someone who felt the need to stand right next to me. Another man decided he would do the same. Now, I didn't feel threatened, just hemmed in. As I stood there I thought about that woman in Oxford one day who was offended when I got to within 6 feet of her in a similar situation!!!

Then other people moved in and I was truly part of a crowd. Once I'd finished I turned round and found 15 - 20 people around me.

The concept of personal space did not transfer to this part of the Colonies. Maybe that's why they gave General Gordon such a hard time. :-)

DW
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Oil Prices Again

This is a Simulcast

 

They are at it again: those people trying to convince us that the financial markets are working efficiently and fairly and have nothing to do with speculation.

 

So there was a financial “expert” blethering away on BBC World yesterday: he was EXPLAINING why the Dollar has surged and why the Pound is falling in value. He didn’t mention speculation in this context and yet we all know that 95% of all deals in foreign currency are to do with speculation.

 

Then this Expert said that because of the “... collapse of the oil price ...”. I must repeat a post I made a couple of weeks ago when I talked about the language of the oil price. Why do they say the price has collapsed? By using the word collapsed they are suggesting that the high prices reached up until about two months ago were normal or expected or acceptable. When the oil price was surging from $90 a barrel to almost $150 a barrel, they said the price was unsustainable ... because of speculation ... because of the disequilibrium of supply and demand. All nonsense of course: it was all because of ill informed speculation.

 

I proved with the example of the cutting of production by the UAE for annual maintenance having no effect on prices that supply and demand had nothing to do with the oil price.

 

So this expert did his best and he mentioned a number of possible factors: interest rates in Australia, the need for changing interest rates in the UK, collapsing oil prices, the threat of recession in the UK. All laudable words and much of it pure drivel. I keep meaning to make notes of the names of these experts so that I can name and shame but I think I am always just overawed at their bare faced effrontery. One thing you should notice is that the BBC doesn’t use the same non BBC expert very often. Wonder why?

 

DW

The US Presidential Election and Sarkozy

US Presidential Election

 

I woke up far too early today and switched on the news. BBC World of course, so that meant hearing NOTHING at all about the World but learning something about America. The vast majority of BBC World’s supposed international coverage is really only American coverage and that gets on my nerves. Nothing wrong with America but if I wanted to learn all about it I would watch CNN.

 

So, they were showing Rudi Giuliani speaking at the Republican Convention: sorry Rudi but you were rubbish. At one point, despite listening carefully, I thought you were attacking McCain rather than praising him. After about three or four minutes it became clear that you were talking about Obama and not McCain. Maybe I dozed off a bit after all!!

 

Anyway, that speech was just emotional nonsense: it got the crowd going, of course, so cheap and cheerful works.

 

Then Sarah Palin came on and I thought I’ll take a listen. I gave her 30 seconds! I am sure I am not the first to say it but it was more Michael Palin than Sarah Palin. I am sorry, by the way, that the US press has homed in on Palin’s private life and her daughter’s private life ... typical, normal gutter press that we in the UK also thrive on.

 

I couldn’t watch the woman though!

 

Sarkozy

 

Speaking of dead ends, have you seen how Nicolas Sarkozy is hopping from country to country these days? It’s classic political style. Fail at home so start travelling and work on your foreign policy. How cheap can these people be? Why not stick it out and face your public? Look at Prime Minister Samak in Thailand. At least Mr Samak is staying put and not trying to do something like solving the so called Tibet crisis instead of trying to resolve his domestic political problems.

 

These people!

 

DW

Keggy

This is a DW special for Kevin Keegan.

I admired Keggy as a player for his spirit and attitude. He was over sold as a player as any discriminating observer of the game of footy knows. Even Keegan himself admits he was never anywhere near as good as the hype would have us believe.

When Keggy was appointed as manager of Newcastle United for the second time following the sacking of Sam Allardyce I said that sacking Sam was a big mistake but not as big as the mistake of appointing Keegan.

Who could have foreseen the nonsense that was then to unfold at NUFC? It beggars belief and if Keggy does resign, who could possibly blame him?

DW

Khartoum Update: weather, Ovaltine and Cocoa, the UN and Kofi Annan, Margaret Thatcher

It was very sunny and hot when I got here on Friday but now it is overcast and very warm. Reminds me of many days in Malawi all of those years ago! It’s not a problem, just a report!

 

Here is some news for you. I have just been to the shopping mall next to the hotel and can probably EXCLUSIVELY reveal, ie no one else has ever told you this, that they sell Ovaltine and Cadbury’s Cocoa there. Now, that is news isn’t it? I have run out of Marmite but didn’t see any of that, I am sad to report.

 

I am still seething, too, over the UN vehicles. I took some photos of just a few of them this morning: all 4x4s and all pretty clean looking. Well, this afternoon there were more than 30 of those big beasties in the car park. All clean too. Why do they need so many very expensive 4x4s to drive around town? I know someone will write to me and say they are helping in Darfur and in the South of the country ... well, I think they are working more against the country than for it. Moreover, for any doubting Thomases, why are there so many people in so many huge and expensive vehicles here at a five star hotel? Where is the cost conscientiousness? What about the opportunity costs of sitting here at what is probably a huge expense when there are people here who are dying of starvation; people who need these clowns to sort out the mess they are part of? I really don’t like this outfit.

 

I said this before but I will remind you. Apart from having spent 5 years in Malawi in the shadow of these people, I was utterly shocked when Kofi Annan got to Sri Lanka after the tsunami of 2006 and refused to visit victims in the Tamil Tiger area. Where is the humanity in that man, then the Secretary General of the UNITED Nations? Following his retirement from the UN, Annan went on to ensure that the illegally elected “President” of an East African country could stay in power by helping to cobble a deal with the Opposition Party. In the meantime hundreds of ordinary people from that country died in Political riots following that bogus election. What a sham of a man. Then his son surfaced from under a big black cloud of alleged corruption. Rotten from the core as Neil Kinnock prophetically said about Margaret Thatcher’s Administration.

 

Speaking of Margaret Thatcher, I have read a couple of times recently that Thatcher is suffering from mental illness: now that’s not news is it? Thatcher was mentally ill long before she became Prime Minister.

 

End of erudite rant!

 

DW

 

 

 

Are Aid Workers all Gay These Days?

Sitting in and around the hotel here in Khartoum, I am wondering if the oddly dressed men and the many men who speak with a lithp or some kindred impediment are all gay.

Is it a requirement now to be gay to be an Aid worker?

DW
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Is it Gay to Moisturise?

A young man sat next to me on the flight from Dubai to Doha yesterday. We didn’t speak and there is nothing wrong with that. So my question is, is it gay to moisturise?

 

This man sat down and applied moisturiser to his face. Then he went to sleep. I was rather offended that he turned his back on me as he got himself comfy. He slept almost all of the 40 minutes it took to get from Dubai to Doha. On arrival the man then got out another potion and sprayed his face with it. I don’t suppose it was fly spray!

 

Just a thought.

 

DW

Is it really THAT bad?

British Chancellor of the Exchequer Alastair Darling is reported to have said that the British Economy is in its worst state for more than 60 years: according to BBC World that is.

 

If that is true then we really are in the mire. Remember the devaluation of 1967? How about Denis Healy having to go cap in hand to the IMF month after month and anyone going abroad was limited to taking £50 with them. Then there were the Thatcher years: with that disastrous Chancellor Nigel Lawson followed eventually by the equally questionable Normal Lamont.

 

I have lived through bad times in the UK then so if it’s the worst for 60 years then it must be bad.

 

Then again, this is some sort of payback for the country living on credit for the last 15 years or so. The boom of the Blair years have now come to a head: all of those people wearing Armani clothes, driving a new BMW and carrying Louis Vuitton bags are having to shop at Aldi and Lidl now as their credit has run out. This is REALLY what Darling is talking about, not the credit crunch from the USA. The credit crunch is merely a symptom of gross mismanagement by governments all over the Western world.

 

Who will suffer, though? Hmm, let me think about that.

 

DW

 

 

US Presidential Circus

Living in hotels for week after week as I often do, it is very difficult for me to avoid the American Presidential Election Pantomime (you can quote me and call it the APE Pantomime, but don’t forget to ascribe it to me!). Since I am not American I do not get a full grasp of what they are doing. However, as an outsider I do know that Obama has inflicted himself on the world’s public for almost two years. Obama and Ms Clinton started their campaigns a year early because they knew it would be tough for them. In addition, they are both so hungry (many say greedy) for power that they needed a massive start on the competition.

 

Well, it worked and in the end the only two Democratic candidates in the ring were those two people. Now they are down to one!

 

Well, apart from being sick to death of the process and telling an American colleague that they could take a leaf out of the British Political book and spend just THREE WEEKS on their general election campaigns, I was distressed yesterday.

 

What happened yesterday? McCain, the oven fried Republican candidate (already 72 years old, extremely boring and an appalling public speaker in my opinion), announced his Vice Presidential nominee candidate: a woman, Sarah Palin. Nothing wrong with a woman. What got me was her strident and grating voice: eeugh! She looks presentable and I might even say pretty. But that voice. I have heard her speak for a total of about 30 seconds and it made me wonder how she managed to have five children with a voice like that!! No offence, ma’am ... in case you get the job!!

 

These are the political insights you don’t get everywhere!

 

 

DW

 

 

 

The UN: plus ca change ...

I am seething!

 

I am in a nice hotel in Khartoum. Outside there are many spotlessly clean but very large 4x4 cars with UN in big letters on them.

 

At the airport it looked to me as if there was an entire area comprising only UN planes and helicopters.

 

Having seen these people  in operation in Malawi, I dread to think what they are up to here.

 

They come for years these UN people and sound the death knell for the country they inflict on themselves on.

 

If I get to talk to any of them I will tell them that I would be able to get them all sent home within around a your providing they gave me a staff of no more than 100 men to work them out with their jobs.  As I did that I am very confident that I would have resolved most if not all of the problems facing the Sudan at the moment.  Brave words but give me a chance and I would get rid of the misery.

 

DW

Mick Channon

Sorry to hear that Mick Channon has been hurt in a car crash. A good footy player from years ago.

Gulf Today introduced this story by saying that former football ace and racing horse trainer is in a STABLE condition.

I kid you not!

DW
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The Burj Dubai

I think it's a magical looking building and here is a snap wot I took in June, just a few weeks ago. I went down to the Burj that day to take photos of it in daylight, at twilight and at night. I think it is a highly photogenic bit of architecture and am looking forward to the day I can go inside it and to the top of it ... DW

Walking in Dubai

I went for a walk this afternoon in Dubai. Wow, that was a hot, hot, hot thing to do. It took me about an hour and a half to stop sweating.

 

Near the clock tower there is an advert for a watch with that duff actor George Clowney as the USP. As if!

 

DW

Olympics 14

I thought I had finished chatting about the Beijing Olympic games and then some utter clown thought it would awfully outre to include an image of Myra Hindley in a promotional video of London.

Hindley was jailed for her part in luring five children and young people into the arms of her lover Ian Brady. Brady then abused, tortured amd murdered these unfortunate people.

Hindley and Brady dumped the bodies of their victims on moorland. Tragically there is one young lad whom these monstrous people killed who is still on the moors somewhere: unfound and alone. The poor lad's mother has spent her life since his death desperately looking for him.

So do you think London should have shown an image of that awful woman celebrating the city?

The good news is that Hindley died in prison.

DW

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Olympics 12a

In spite of any impression I might have created to the contrary, I have enjoyed the Beijing Olympics.

Team GB has done pretty well but I have been keen to point out the errors of some of our delusional athletes. The athletes who were only hopeful and not driven. The athletes draped in bling and tattoos and dyed hair showed how they were diverting their energies away from a superior performance.

The final moan concerns the high five. Who has taught these people to hug each other and dish out high fives at the least opportunity? Just ridiculous in my opinion.

End of the Olympics.

Now for the Paraympics where things will be so much better.

DW
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Short of Nothing

These things pop into one's head don't they?

My mother, RIP, used to say she was short of nothing she hadn't got. I suddenly just thought about that and for the first time ever, I decided to try to understand what it meant. I concluded by thinking what a clever little saying it is.

I don't know if mother created the saying or not but I like it.

DW
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eGate Card

My eGate card let me down as I arrived at DXB on Saturday morning. However, you can rejoice now because I went to the eGate office and had it set up again.

Praise be!!

DW
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Wolf and Sheep's Clothing

Ever been tempted by those astonishing offers whereby you are told you can share in many milions of Dollars if only you would help someone you have never met.

Of course, it's all rubbish and having shared your full bank details with these people they simply walk into your bank account and steal all of the money in it.

Well now, they have put the wolf in sheep's clothing. I just received the following message an hour or so ago. These people are evil predators. Don't fall for their horrible tricks.

Their cruddy message follows:

Attention:

This email is not in any manner directed to you, but its purposely and specifically directed to Nigeria Scam victims. . However, if you have fallen for Nigerian Scams, do not hesitate to contact us or visit our website for more details on how we can help.

We shall be waiting to hearing from you been certain that you were truly scammed by a Nigerian and you have proves to back your claims. Please read the full report at our website: ... URL deleted to protect the unwary.


Yours faithfully,

Brian Adams

Nigerian Government Reimbursement Committee

Message ends

Please be careful.

DW

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